Priority – ourselves or others? Give to ourselves or give to others? At work, in our personal lives, towards our families and friends, towards our neighbors or strangers, should we put others’ needs first before ours?
“Put your oxygen mask on first before helping others” is what a flight attendant says when you ride an airplane.
If you are a leader of a team or an organization, with the chaotic daily events at work that you must deal with, do you always put your teams first before your needs? Take for example things you need to be done, do you take a step back, think of what they are doing, and have second thoughts about giving out additional tasks, or do you just go and call them and discuss what needs to be done without any concerns for what their workload is at the current moment?
It’s important for leaders to strike a balance between their own needs and the needs of their teams. While it’s crucial to ensure that tasks are completed and goals are met, it’s equally important to consider the workload and well-being of the team members. Effective leaders take the time to assess the current workload of their teams, communicate openly, and seek their input before assigning additional tasks. By understanding the capacity and priorities of their teams, leaders can make informed decisions that support both the success of the organization and the well-being of the individuals within the team.
Or when you get your pay raise and bonus, have you ever thought of that big amount of money and compared it to what the rest of the team is getting and realized that it is the sum of everyone working for you? Have you thought of just distributing it to them equally, you included?
The idea of receiving a pay raise and bonus can certainly prompt one to ponder the broader implications of compensation and value within a team. Upon reflection, it may become apparent that the increase in remuneration is, in essence, a collective sum representing the combined efforts of all team members. This realization may inspire thoughts about the concept of equitable distribution, with the consideration of dispersing the additional funds equally among the team. The notion of distributing the financial gain in such a manner reflects a collaborative and inclusive perspective, acknowledging the contributions of each individual within the team. This approach not only aligns with principles of fairness and equity but also fosters a sense of unity and shared success. Embracing a mindset of collective prosperity and collaboration can enrich the team dynamic and reinforce the notion of mutual support and appreciation within the workplace.
Or when you need to manage costs which may mean reducing costs, the first one to go is labor which results to a reduction of manpower which means moving people out of the organization when in fact, your pay could be a combination of 3 to 5 people in your team, have you ever thought that it should have been you that had been removed from the organization?
When organizations face financial challenges, they often resort to cost-cutting measures, with labor being one of the primary areas targeted for reduction. This, in turn, leads to a decrease in manpower and can result in employees being let go. It’s natural for individuals to reflect on their own position within the company during such times. The possibility that one’s role could potentially be covered by a combination of several other team members may lead to introspection and thoughts about one’s own professional future. It’s a situation that can evoke a range of emotions, including concern, uncertainty, and a renewed focus on performance and contribution in the workplace. It’s essential for both employees and organizations to navigate such challenging times with empathy, transparency, and open communication to ensure the best possible outcomes for all involved.
Maybe it crossed your mind. Maybe not. And of course, you also have needs. What you have earned and what you are entitled to get is a product of years of experience and your skillset that your team does not possess yet. Thus you turn a blind eye because you think what you bring is more valuable than what the rest of your team brings.
How about outside the context of work? How much of your time and money are you giving to other people? Does it leave you with nothing that you suffer in the end? How much of yourself are you giving and have you thought of what is going to happen to you in the future when you are all dried out and have nothing to give?
Are we selfless or selfish?
To me, if we want to live a life of serving and helping others, we must help ourselves first. If we are not strong enough, we would not be able to provide for anyone else. And we should not give everything. We should always consider ourselves first before giving.
It’s essential to prioritize our own well-being and strength so that we can effectively support and assist others. This concept emphasizes the importance of self-care and self-preservation in order to be of genuine help to those around us. By acknowledging our own needs and ensuring that we are in a good place, we can ultimately contribute positively to the well-being of others. Therefore, finding a balance between self-care and helping others is vital for a sustainable and meaningful life dedicated to serving and supporting others.
This is reality. At every moment, we don’t just give when people ask, we have that moment in our heads saying yes or no. A very quick moment in time that makes us decide if we want to give or not or how much to give.
As the year closes, look into the future, not to what had happened. What do we want to get for ourselves so we could help others? I think that is what we should keep in mind so we strike a balance between ensuring we are strong enough to help those around us and providing for those who need it.
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