Envy—the green-eyed monster that creeps into our minds when we see others achieving what we desire. It’s a natural emotion, but how we channel it determines our path. Instead of stewing in envy, let’s transform it into motivation. Here’s a blueprint to turn envy into action and pave the way toward our goals.
Are you better off than someone else? Of course you are. Being able to read this post means you either have a smartphone or a personal computer connected to the internet which all costs money.
Are you sure you are better off than someone else? Of course not. You look at your social media feeds and see your friends posting filtered pictures of themselves, of the food they are about to eat, of places they have been, shot in what seemed to be a perfect setting, perfect lighting and perfect angle.
We always compare our situations with other people. We want to know what others are up to and are we doing better in life compared to them. Do we have a better phone? Maybe. Maybe not. Maybe we justify that the phone we have is what we really want and need. Or is that just us making enough reasons because what we currently spend most of the time holding in our hands is what we can only afford?
How about the house that we live in? When we visit other people’s house that are bigger than ours or seem to be designed by a famous interior designer that costs a lot of money, we stand in awe and appreciate it. We start envisioning having the same thing for ourselves. Then, go back to thinking that we can’t afford it and we have what we need.
The car that we have. Not all of us have their own personal car. For those who have one, on the road, we again tend to compare what we have. “Is my car better?” That’s the thought that immediately comes to our minds.
A close friend of mine had just bought their own house in Batangas and had moved there to live. My initial thought was to buy our own house then I went back to saying to myself that we are better off renting as we love our house now. Well, that’s true. Not just reasoning. This house has brought us many luck in this decade and continues to do so. That’s what we believe. We don’t want to move anymore.
Another friend of mine just received the bad news that the school where she had enrolled her daughters suddenly shut down due to insufficient enrollment. My initial thought? We had chosen a better school for our kids. We are better than her.
We always compare our situation with others, specially to those people we know. From what I read, it is survival instincts that kick in. If we are better off, we have better chances of survival. If we are not, then we need to do something or we get left behind by the society we want to belong and live in.
Don’t feel bad. It is okay to experience this sort of emotion. Most articles you’ll read will say otherwise because it is not mentally healthy or even right to feel envious of the success of others. But to me, it is okay. What’s important is what you do. Action is the only thing that will define you.
If you feel envious of what others have, don’t immediately jump onto the bandwagon. If you really want it, create a plan.
- What do you want?
- How will you get it?
- When are you going to start?
- Do it.
These three questions would really help you control and manage your thoughts, rather than just being emotional, and turn it to actionable items that will take you to where you want to be.
When you see you are better off than someone else, then lend a hand. The people in the street begging, give some alms. Your relatives struggling with their own problems, help them. If your friends are experiencing something you don’t want to go through yourself, be there as much as you can.
Whatever reason we come up for ourselves justifying being envious or feeling better than others, accept that it is okay. But don’t wallow in that feeling. It will not help you. It will destroy you.
If you really want it, do something about it.
Envy—the green-eyed monster that creeps into our minds when we see others achieving what we desire. It’s a natural emotion, but how we channel it determines our path. Instead of stewing in envy, let’s transform it into motivation. Here’s a blueprint to turn envy into action and pave the way toward our goals.
Before embarking on any journey, clarity is essential. Ask yourself: What do you want? Is it financial independence, a fulfilling career, or a healthier lifestyle? Be specific. Write it down. Visualize it. Whether it’s a corner office, a cozy home, or a fit physique, articulate your desires.
Analyze Your Emotions
Envy often masks deeper feelings. Is it admiration for someone else’s success or frustration with your own stagnation? Understand the root cause. Perhaps you’re inspired by a colleague’s promotion or a friend’s thriving business. Acknowledge these emotions—they’re your compass.
Create a Plan
Envy dissipates when we take action. How will you get what you want? Break it down. Research, learn, and strategize. If it’s financial independence, explore investment options, side hustles, or passive income streams. If it’s a dream job, update your resume, network, and acquire relevant skills.
Set Realistic Goals
Envy can lead to impulsive decisions. Instead, set achievable milestones. If you envy someone’s fitness, don’t sign up for a marathon tomorrow. Start with a daily walk or a gym membership. Gradual progress compounds over time. Remember, Rome wasn’t built in a day.
Take the First Step
When are you going to start? The answer: Now. Procrastination fuels envy. Begin today. Send that email, enroll in that course, or save that first dollar. Momentum builds momentum. Each small action propels you forward.
Cultivate a Growth Mindset
Envy thrives in a fixed mindset—the belief that abilities are innate. Shift to a growth mindset. Embrace challenges, learn from failures, and celebrate others’ successes. Their achievements aren’t your limitations; they’re proof of what’s possible.
Celebrate Progress
As you progress, celebrate every victory. Whether it’s paying off debt, acing an interview, or shedding a few pounds, acknowledge it. Envy loses its grip when you recognize your own growth.
Envy need not be a stumbling block. It can be a stepping stone. Transform it into determination, and watch your dreams materialize. So, dear reader, what do you want? How will you get it? When will you start? The answer lies within you. Do it.
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