Ouibaitori (pronounced as oh-buy-toe-ree) is a Japanese idiom that is based on four trees – Cherry, Plum, Peach, and Apricot. I don’t know much about trees but the idiom simply means we all grow and bloom at our own pace. In the workplace, this could mean that oubaitori is running at our own pace.
I can’t remember where I first read this word. All I can remember is I did searched its meaning. “We all grow and bloom at our own pace.” In a world where we run, in a world where we think we have to beat everyone first, in a world where we want to become first, this idiom can put everything in perspective.
Different starting point
When I was starting my career, I had an opportunity to get to know a person who opened my eyes to the world of investments. This person had about Php 100k (about $1,800 by this time) in investment. I was told that time that to start an investment in stocks, that is the amount of money that I need. During those time, I do not have that kind of money. I was living paycheck to paycheck. I was supporting my wife and son. We barely had enough to finance our day-to-day expenses. But the desire to invest and get rich, of course, was implanted in head during that time.
That person and I were on the same level at work. We have the same title. The workload of our jobs are the same. We are paid the same. We have the same family size. So, how come that person is able to have an investment while I am struggling. Well, our stories are different. Our backgrounds and family history are different. A wealthy family and a poor family. The starting point was different.
We always wonder how come others are able to achieve something while we don’t. We ask ourselves why they seem to be lucky, affluent than us, and are better in life. Well, sometimes it is not about what we have done. It is about the starting point. Some grew up with wealthy family while some with poor family. There is a difference between where we started and therefore, some will reach their goals earlier than us. Others will still be running the race thinking they are left behind.
Opportunities and roadblocks
When I became a manager, I had been interviewing candidates for open positions. I had the privilege to talk to people and get to know their stories. In these interviews, one candidate said, “My friends had advanced in their careers. I am still doing the same thing that I am doing two years ago while they are now managers. I want to move up just like them.” Well, it is good that this candidate has some goals to pursue but comparing this person’s achievement with those friends is not the way to do it.
I had the same situation. The people I started working with during the start of my career rose up to the ranks of vice presidents while I still a manager. The highest position I had was a director but that was just a short stint. Those people who have higher positions than I were given opportunities. They did very well. Relationships was built. Trust was given to them. Potential was there. Thus, the position were given to them. I, on the other hand, was given the opportunity too, however, I did not open those doors with full intent. I had my own roadblocks that stopped me from pushing forward that I did not think of overcoming. This, coupled with enjoying what I thought was the meaning of life, made me walk and stop.
I can not say what the candidate had gone through and was left behind by those friends. But for me, I know that we get left behind because we focused on different things. My attention was attuned to other things that does not help me achieve what I want to achieve. This made me stuck where I was and had not reached where my colleagues are now.
Not at the same time
It doesn’t matter if others had reached the finish line first. We think we should have been there first, or at least reached the end with them. No. That does not matter. What matters is we get to the finish line. And, not everyone’s finish line, but our own finish line. When we compare where we are with others, we just feel depressed. Come to think of it. They don’t care where you are. Everyone has their own problems. They will just keep running for their own. If we try to go after them, then we might be running towards something that we do not care about.
Our starting point are different. I, for one, started with poverty. I remember when I was kid days that we do not have anything to eat beside rice, salt, and cooking oil. The friends that I have now, or the people that I worked with, never had that experience. Their stories when they were kids are different than what I have.
The opportunities laid out to me where different. The situation is different. My former colleagues stayed with the same company for years while I moved to about 5 different companies in a span of about 20 years. My challenges were different. The competition were different. Work demand changes across different companies. And the people I worked with varied with their own personal agendas.
Grow and bloom differently
But still, I ran the race. Now, I could say I am happy where I am. It is different from my friends. Some are working abroad. Some holds higher position. Others are earning more money than I. That is not what I have. But this is my race. My own race. I have what I need.
Let’s all remember that we should not compare what others have to what we have. We all must remember that we are all different from each other. Our starting point, our abilities, and the opportunities laid out in front of us are not the same with others. We run our own race. Our speed and pace is different from one another. We have our own finish line. We grow and bloom differently.


