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MY EXPERIENCE | MY EXPERTISE

Category: Work

  • Protect your mental health in office politics & office drama

    Protect your mental health in office politics & office drama

    KEY POINTS
    > Office politics comes in many forms such as gossips, power struggles, insubordination and arguments which could lead to backstabbing, discrimination, harassment and bulling.
    > Office gossips can be avoided by staying away from the conversation, changing the topic, ignoring and putting oneself in the shoes of someone.
    > Protect your mental health in office politics by spreading good things, building relationships, plant ideas, and being a survivor instead of a victim

    What is office politics

    Office politics can have a negative impact on mental health. In an organization that has a workplace culture such as this may seem strong when seen from the outside but is slowly decaying inside. While it can be leveraged to be successful, just to some extent, the damage it brings far more outweighs the little advantage it may have.

    Office politics comes in many forms. Office drama is one wherein gossips, power struggles, insubordination and arguments are rampant which seems, in an organization that has this, to be a regular thing in the workplace. These leads to backstabbing, discrimination, and sometimes harassment and bullying.

    These negative results are prevalent and often time lead to legal matters, office politics can also affect power dynamics, office relationships, and career advancement. While there may be short term gains from having this type of culture, the detrimental effect on mental health could be severe. Moreover, work-life balance is highly affected by the stress brought by office politics.

    So, if it is something organization have, can it be leveraged for the benefit of people in the organization? If not, how do we prevent it from affecting us and protect our mental health? What could organization leaders and members do to overcome it? Whose responsibility is it anyway?

    How to deal with office gossip

    I read the above excerpt from Simon Sinek’s book entitled Leaders Eat Last. These sentences resonate so much about office politics, particularly office gossip. When people talk about a person behind their backs and tell stories not for them to tell, hidden behind the water cooler conversation are two things that are happening – building a community and destroying relationships. These two stem from trust and dishonesty. People who enjoy a once-in-a-while office gossip tend to gather together and build a community among themselves based on the common activity which is gossiping. However, it also destroys trust from the person who is the topic of conversation as his or her story is for him or her to tell. Not to mention, office gossips are usually negative. Rarely, no one talks about good things when gossiping.

    I had my fair share of experiencing this in my career. It usually happens when there is so much stuff going on, stress gets to people, and eventually, people start talking about another person they hate. Without realizing it, they had already formed a negative conclusion about the character of the person in topic and this affected the way they dealt with them.

    Office gossip becomes a norm before long. It has become an almost daily activity for people and they spend a good amount of time talking about or making fun of a particular person. Again, by doing so, it changes how you interact with that person. When we know something negative about the person, it seems that we become a little better than him or her, and at the back of our heads, we have a preconceived notion that he or she is not capable as much as we knew the person before the gossip.

    To stop or at least minimize office gossip, here are some actions we could take:

    Do not join the conversation. When people start talking about someone else, just ignore them. Joining in the conversation is adding fuel to the fire. The more people talk about it, the more it spreads. It is the power of word of mouth.

      Shift the topic. There would be times when you will not be able to avoid the conversation especially when you fear the feeling of being left out. That is fine. We can acknowledge that feeling. Listen to what is being discussed and then shift the conversation slowly to another topic to stop the gossip. It could be something related to the person’s work or a project or work that you may need more information or something out of the blue like popular trend on social media or sports game results from the previous night. It could work. It could not. But the slow shift in conversation would make people realize of better topics to talk about.

        Ignore. Easier said than done. Easier over chats, but harder in actual conversation as your curious mind will always strive to listen. The need to know will always be there and being in the know will help you be part of that community. But, do you really want to belong with them? Ignoring a chat message is easy. You just don’t reply. In an actual face-to-face conversation, if you are in a group, you just need to stay silent. Let them talk. Do not be part of it. If you are just overhearing discussion from another table or clump of people talking, just put on your earphones, listen to music or watch a video.

          Put yourself in the person’s shoes. One thing to remember, once you know the people who talk behind another person, do not tell your story to them. What’s preventing them from gossiping about you? These people are not trustworthy and do not deserve to be confidants. They destroy reputations. They destroy relationships. This is what causes a company to decay inside.

            The core of office politics is office gossip. When people spread out stories that may or may not be true, it affects the way people look at a certain person. This widespread of dishonesty can hamper good working relationships and slow down progress.

            There are other forms of office politics such as backstabbing, credit stealing, power plays, aggression, bullying and dramas but I think gossiping spells it all. Everything starts with one gossip and all hell breaks loose if people start spreading it.

            And these affects our mental health.

            How to protect your mental health in office politics

            Knowing that office politics will always be there, regardless of the company, it would be best to leverage it to our advantage. The negative effect of office politics on our mental health may lead us to become depressed and unable to function and perform the work we need to do. If we can use it to our advantage, then maybe we can also protect our mental health.

            Mental health by definition affects the way we think, we feel, and act. It is our psychological, emotional, and social well-being. By leveraging office politics, we can prevent its negative impact and instead use it to our advantage to win at work.

            Here are some actions we could do to use it and have a positive impact:

            Spread good things. Instead of talking about the negative things about a person, start talking about his or her positive traits. Talk about what the person did successfully and learn from it. Discussing topics that are positive will not hurt the person but only propel him or her to advance his or her position and work. In effect, to our mental health, this brings a positive euphoria for us. Compared to negative topics that would only cause stress, topics of positive in nature will alleviate any bad feelings we may have thus protecting our mental health.

              Building relationship. The people who usually enjoy office gossip are subconsciously wanting to form relationships with others. The best way to do that is to find common ground. Gossiping provides that as we all love good gossip. However, as joining the conversation is a bad thing, not to mention being the one to spread it around. For a brief moment, enjoy the conversation. Do not join in. Just listen. Then start sharing positive things with the genuine intention of helping the person’s name become positive for others, not the other way around. From that crowd of people, eventually, you will see who are worth being with and those you would rather stay away from as there will be some who would prefer to negatively gossip instead of changing their attitude.

                Plant ideas. Office politics results from too much office gossip. People talks spread like wildfire and it is nearly impossible to completely extinguish it. You can leverage this by instead of discussing negative things, discuss something else that could help resolve issues. Put out what you think would be best to do to solve an existing problem. Or even posing a question and asking them what they think will change the conversation and make them think of the idea. That may or may not spread however, it would definitely change things.

                  Be the survivor. Lastly, if you are the victim of office gossip, in my experience, it would be best not to react. Be proud. You have been the talk of the town. If your boss hears about it and has a discussion with you, whatever it is, just talk it out. Of course, the degree of the topic may entail you keeping or not keeping your job however, the truth is the truth. So be it. Ignoring and letting it be will kill the fire. Reacting will only make it grow bigger. In some cases, if it is too big, you just need to find somewhere else to work. No need to hurt yourself by staying where people do not trust or make fun of you.

                    Office gossip to office politics to mental health

                    Protecting our mental health against office politics has never been important even without us realizing it. Everything starts with a water-cooler conversation about someone and that spreads like wildfire. That fire eventually causes significant effects on someone’s reputation. Depending on the fire, it could help the person burn to ashes or burn bright. By cultivating a more positive discussion amongst coworkers, office gossip can be harnessed to build relationships and propel someone to stardom. However, if we are the topic, we can ignore it, admit the truth, or just move away and change our environment.

                    Our mental health is our psychological, emotional, and social well-being. We are ultimately responsible for protecting it. Instead of becoming a victim, we can be a survivor by choosing how we react. Our actions will spell out the difference. Once we figured it out, we can become better than who were yesterday.

                  • Inspiration Motivation Discipline | All of it

                    Inspiration Motivation Discipline | All of it

                    Inspiration, motivation, and discipline are mostly compared with each other which is better. But, we can use all three to be successful.

                    Inspiration kicks us off. Motivation keeps us going. Discipline drives results. Simple as that. The thing is, without anything that inspires us, we fail to start. Without extrinsic factors to motivate us, we stop. And discipline takes a lot of energy to do. All of these three together are taken separately but for our benefit, we could probably harness all of it to thrive in life.

                    We all await for inspiration to come. Some of us look for it consciously while some may just experience an epitome that kick-starts something within us. It comes from different sources, may it be one or a collective effect of experiences. Whatever that may be, it is a starting point when we realize something great that we decide to pursue it.

                    The absence of it may keep us stagnant in where we are which makes us wonder about the meaning of life. We lose the sense of fulfillment as we go about our regular day doing the same old things without seeing the end of it.

                    Though once we have been inspired, the next question is how to keep going. This is where motivation comes in. It becomes the pushing or pulling force that drives us. It could be intrinsic or extrinsic. This a debatable argument as it is said that motivation should be intrinsic. It must be your why. Although, I would say that in the world we live in, we have to accept that we are always driven by external value. What we could tangibly experience.

                    These two would not be enough to gain the desired results. We need discipline. Simply put, a habit that we strictly follow and do. A routine. Miss a day, we will be okay. Miss two days in a row, we are at risk. Miss three days, then we need to do something else.

                    Discipline keeps us moving without seeing any immediate results. The reward and the benefit would not be visible after doing the work. The impact could happen a day after, a week, a month, or even years. This makes it harder to be disciplined. However, once we harness this, it is very beneficial in the long run. It will help us achieve what we were inspired to do.

                    So, how could we harness these three? Let alone, how could we start? Can we combine all three to thrive in any aspect in our lives? Or, we need to use it separately?

                    Here is what I think…

                    How do we get inspired

                    We all know inspiration comes when we least expect it. When we try to find it, it eludes us. It is something we can not force. It is not within our control. Though, we can do something about it. As inspiration is a culmination of various experiences, the way to get inspired is get exposed.

                    • Exposure. Experiencing different things will create new nerve connections in our brains. As our brain tries and effectively connect each experience that we have, it will eventually provide an idea that we will realize we have not thought of before. So, simply put, learning new things, being exposed to other things especially those that we have not tried before will possibly light up that bulb in our head. We then may say that one experience may have inspired us but, it is actually a culmination of experiences.

                    How to get motivated

                    Our reasons. Our whys. Our goals. It has been said that this is what keeps us motivated. Knowing why we do things, and our purpose for doing such is the only motivation that we need. While there are extrinsic motivations that exist such as appreciation and monetary benefits, this could prove to be only temporary. The only motivation that we need is the why.

                    • Why. Being inspired is one thing. Being motivated is another. Motivation keeps us going to achieve what we set out to do. The powerful force behind it is our why. When we are inspired to do something without knowing the why behind it, we will not be able to continue. Knowing our reasons could make us move forward. Our reasons could be short term, or shallow, or long-term, or deep. What I meant here is that we can all decide our whys. We should not judge anyone of their own purpose. It is up to us what we consider as our reason for doing such things. Oftentimes times we force people to look deeper inside themselves to come up with a deeper why but rarely this works. We are all human and our desire to survive is dependent on how we see our world. Each other’s why is different from one another.

                    How to stay disciplined

                    The energy to keep moving. The power to be resilient. The desire to achieve our goals. All of these will not be possible without inspiration and motivation. Most people get inspired and stop in the middle. A lot of us get motivated and stop when we do not see immediate results. These prevent us from accomplishing what we set out to do. Only discipline can take us where we want to be.

                    • Take us. Discipline is hard. It is difficult. Only some people are able to have this and pursue their dreams. With so many obstacles in life preventing us or challenging us, in achieving our goals, without discipline, we fail consistently. The best solution to be disciplined is to remove the obstacles. We must make it easy for us to stay on course. We must make it a habit for us. Once we are able to do that, discipline becomes a routine. Of course, life will always throw something at us that will divert us from the path. Acknowledge that. If that would be a regular obstacle, adjust the approach. If not, then consider it as a one-time off. The next day, return to your regimen.

                    Start, remember, habit

                    Inspiration is only the starting line. It is like knowing you want to run and positioned yourself along with other runners. Why you run is your motivation. To reach the finish line first is the reason why you are running. Putting your leg in front of the other consistently is the discipline. You have started. You have your reason. You just need to keep running.

                    These three comes hand in hand. One cannot be beneficial without the other two. Most of the articles we read online will say that one of these are more important. As basic as it is, most people look for motivation. But without being inspired and disciplined, nothing will be achieved.

                    We need to harness all three. By doing so, it could help us thrive in life and be better than who we were yesterday.

                  • Why wait for low salary to increase (or should you negotiate)

                    Why wait for low salary to increase (or should you negotiate)

                    There have been multiple articles written about low salary and comparing it to the demand of work. The effort required to do the job usually is not compensated by the pay the person receives. This usually affects those at the bottom of the corporate ladder even if during performance review meetings, they are hailed to be the core people who make the company thrive and successful.

                    Another topic revolving around low salary is during the hiring stages when a person is moving from one company to another. When a person is being recruited, what usually happens is that the company hiring the person asks for the person’s payslip to know what is his/her current pay. From this, the hiring company will offer a little bit more to get the person to sign up, even if the average market value for the position is more than the offer. Or, the hiring company has a budget to pay more.

                    Additionally, new graduates fall prey on this too. Since they do not have any experience coming out of school, the offer that companies give are usually the bare minimum. Maybe with some added benefits, sure. However, most of the time, it is just enough to meet the government’s requirement of minimum wage. What is worse is that there are companies who would offer below minimum and the person could not refuse as he/she needs the job.

                    In these three scenarios, how could one get paid what he/she deserves? Is there a risk in negotiating? How does this impact future pay of a person? But first, how would one know if the pay is lower than what he/she deserves relative to the work?

                    Is the salary fair for the work

                    First off, we all need to know how much is the prevailing rate for the work we are to do. This includes the complexity, the responsibility, the hours, the industry, the location, and ultimately the position. Knowing all of these and the current market value would help us assess if our current pay is fair and enough.

                    In one city in the Philippines, the company I worked for had a site there. The cost of living there is about 50% lower compared to the capital city of Manila. Therefore, based on this, the wages of our employees working there is far lower than our employees working in our site in the capital city.

                    However, the work demand is the same. The stress is the same. The pressure is the same. This created a little bit of animosity between people from the two sites as salaries and lives were compared. Imagine doing the work the same as your colleague and being pay less. Of course, the simple explanation is that the need of the cost of living is lower compared to the capital city but then again, the argument is that the effort is the same.

                    Is the salary according to current market rate

                    Aside from the difference of the cost of living between the two locations, the industry rate is different too although not far from each other. The prevailing rate in the capital city was only about 20% higher than the the other city for the same work.

                    Salary alignment usually happens every five years. This is done primarily to compensate for the rate of inflation. Without reviewing the current salary packages and benefits, wage earners are at a disadvantage as the demand only goes up while the salary remains the same.

                    This creates a delay in matching the salary to the prevailing rates as inflation changes every year. By the time the alignment happens, the person with the low salary may have not been compensated enough for a couple of years.

                    Is the salary enough to support the family

                    We all work to earn. Our earnings are to support ourselves and our loved ones. We work to provide and create a better and more comfortable life for us and the people around us. Therefore, if our salary is not enough to do that, it leads to frustration and stress.

                    While most of us take what is offered especially if we are out of a job and trying to get one, we do not consider this anymore. We just have to get by. We accept the job and figure out the rest along the way. This may work for the short term, however, once a couple of years have passed, it becomes a roadblock for us to enjoy life.

                    Knowing these three things helps us better gauge if the pay is enough. Note that I did not mention talent and skills because what we are trying to understand is whether the salary is enough. Talent and skills will determine how far will you be from the average. If you are the best in the field, at least perform better than the rest, or have potential to do great things then, of course you should be getting more than the average.

                    Paid what you are worth

                    Knowing these three things will help you look for the most suitable work for you according to pay in your line of career. By understanding the prevailing rate and your needs would help you better make a decision in choosing a job offer.

                    This also applies if you are a current employee and looking to get paid higher. Most of the time, getting a salary boost only happens during annual appraisal if the company offers it and promotion. Usually, the latter will just give you the bare minimum for that position which is what you could compare to the prevailing rate.

                    A caution reminder. There are companies that offer higher salary packages just to get you to sign up. For this, do not take it as it is. If it is too good to be true, then it must be. A lot of people who got blinded by the money lost their jobs after a couple of months as they did not do due diligence on the company they joined.

                    Personally, I waited for my salary to go up. I just did what I could to the best of my knowledge and abilities and eventually, I got paid more than the average rate. There are some who would jump from one company to another every 2 years to get a salary bump without promotion but this is not 100% effective. They got stuck at their levels with a high salary and no one will accept them anymore. This means that along the way, building knowledge and skills is imperative to climb up and get a higher pay.

                    In summary, you can negotiate. Use the prevailing rate and assess your needs. Do not get paid less than what the work demands from you. That is just not fair. And while you are at the job, continue building your skills. This is when you wait. The time will come when you get paid more than what you are worth.

                  • Leadership Challenges | How to overcome it

                    Leadership Challenges | How to overcome it

                    Leadership challenges are prevalent in the workplace. While we all look up to our leaders to help find a solution, we must not forget that they are human too.

                    A leader is one who knows the way, goes the way, and shows the way.

                    John Maxwell

                    I have been under many leaders in my entire 20 years working in the corporate world. I have learned a lot of things from various people that I have applied in my own strategy in leading my own team.

                    Up until now, I envision them in my head as invincible. I see them as people with so much grit, perseverance, knowledge, and desire to be successful. I have tried to emulate them as much as I can though, I know my limits. I can only do so much.

                    During the times I was leading a team, it became apparent to me how difficult it is to become a leader. The constant pressure and stress, the ability to make the team effective, balancing work and personal life, dealing with difficult people, and adapting to change are some of what have become daily tasks for me. I could only imagine what is it like for the leaders I followed. It must be harder for them.

                    Therefore, the purpose of this blog is to share what I have seen from my leaders on how they dealt with the daily demands and help new and future leaders overcome them to be successful in their leadership roles.

                    The challenges

                    There are many challenges that each and every leader in the workplace goes through. These challenges vary from simple task completion to attending to the well-being of those he/she leads. Below are some of the most common that a leader encounters almost on a daily basis. If you are a new leader or will become one, it would be best to be prepared as these will come your way. So, along with these known obstacles are actions to overcome them.

                    Delegating tasks effectively

                    In my industry, it is easy to drown in many tasks that need immediate attention. Being in a BPO company exposed me to different people both inside and outside our company and combined with these are different requirements and asks. This makes work impossible to complete by yourself.

                    One of my previous leaders is so good at juggling things. While she knows what to do, she entrusted most of the work to us. There was a moment in our company when we were to launch support for multiple companies along with attending our regular internal and external client meetings. If she had attended to all of those, everything may have fallen apart. However, she did not. The work was distributed amongst those of us who could deliver.

                    Here is what she had done.

                    • Know the complexity. We went into a meeting and discussed the complexity of each task. We all gathered together with her to understand the need and what we must do.
                    • Prioritization. After knowing how difficult a task was and how important, we then itemized which ones needed more attention and put them on top of the list.
                    • Matching. Once we knew which ones to prioritize and which were complex, the tasks were assigned to whoever was mostly able to create the greatest impact. For example, the number one priority and the most important ones were taken by her. The rest were assigned to us based on what we could do at the moment. There are of course some tasks that were assigned to less capable individuals but the impact is negligible.
                    • Follow through. We set a regular follow-through discussion to understand the progress and if there was a need to make adjustments. It was restarting. If we need to reassign or if we need to provide help to others, then we do that. Otherwise, the plan pushes through.

                    There will be a lot of things happening at the same time that will require a leader’s attention. Delegating the tasks effectively is a sure way to complete and address all of them. This method capitalizes on the strength of the team resulting in accomplishing more in a short span of time.

                    Dealing with difficult employees

                    As a leader, it is a must to remember that they are handling people almost all of their working hours. While it is very optimistic to envision a team working like a well-oiled machine, there will always be people who will make accomplishing goals a little more difficult but not impossible.

                    When one from your team is starting to become difficult to work with, here are some steps you could take. Keep in mind that they are human too at the same time, they joined to do the work.

                    • Know the situation. One of my leaders is very good at this. Once she got to know that one from our team was not able to deliver results and had many excuses, she talked straight to the person to understand what was going on. Instead of hearing it from others, it is best to hear it from the person him/herself.
                    • Provide solutions. After understanding the situation, May it be personal or about work, a solution was immediately presented. It could be something she could do or something she needed from someone else. She did not dwell on what was happening. She focused on resolving it. Dwelling on the problem will only aggravate the emotions and that will not solve it.
                    • Not promising. Committing to do something and promising the desired results are two different things. There are many factors that could affect the outcome of the solution that are outside her control therefore, she just committed to doing what she could to resolve the matter but not promising any results. You may think this is giving hope and yes, it does. In the workplace, promising could put a leader in a very difficult position compromising his/her integrity thus this leader of mine knows that. She made sure to only focus on what her position enables her to do and the rest are up to fate.
                    • Letting go. No one can force anyone. Again, people join any company to work. If that is not being done, it is time to let go. There is no point in giving people a hand if they will not reach for it. I always say that we can only do so much for other people. In the end, it is up to them to be open for help. Letting go could benefit them more than pulling them.

                    Handling stress and pressure

                    Grace under pressure. This only means that no matter the circumstances, a leader remains focused on the task at hand. It is easier said than done but this leader of mine have shown it to me multiple times.

                    • Goal. What are we trying to achieve? That is a question I personally learned from a client. Understanding and keeping it mind keeps all efforts directed to that.
                    • Assessing. This leader of mine keeps going back to the goal when we are discussing the actions we want to take. Does it take us to near to our goals? Does it help resolve any obstacle? Does it add value? If not, the actions is remove.
                    • Prioritization. Juggling multiple tasks can be an art. But prioritization is a science that yields results. To handle pressure and stress, focusing the energy and team resources on meeting a prioritized goal helps relieve the pressure and deal with stress.
                    • Removing distraction. Lastly, this leader of mine rarely gets disturbed. Most of the stress and pressure come from the multiple distractions we get through emails, calls, and chats. By disconnecting at a certain point in time, this leader of mine is able to focus on what is important and necessary. Not everything is urgent.

                    Leaders are human too

                    As I mentioned in the beginning, I had this preconceived notion that my leaders were invincible. They can surpass anything. They can accommodate almost everything. They can do so many things.

                    Not to mention that since they are people like us, they also have their personal lives. They have their own problems they deal with at home. They have their own family that they love and support. And just like us, they juggle both daily.

                    Understanding the challenges a leader goes through daily makes us appreciate them more. We usually look up to them to get issues resolved and seek help and guidance while forgetting that they are just humans who can thrive at work and in life. By knowing what they do to overcome the challenges in a leadership role, we could better help them and in effect ourselves to be successful in life.

                  • How do you keep your connections?

                    How do you keep your connections?

                    We all hear about building connections. That networking is a powerful tool, especially in business. It could help you achieve many great things during the course of your life. And in our personal matters, during the low points in time, the people we know could help us get up, stand up, and face the world again.

                    We frequently hear about the importance of building connections and cultivating strong networks. This emphasis on networking is particularly crucial in the realm of business, where it can open doors to new opportunities, collaborations, and advancements. A well-established network can facilitate numerous accomplishments and contribute significantly to one’s professional trajectory. Moreover, when faced with personal challenges and hardships, the support and assistance of individuals within our circle can be instrumental in helping us navigate through difficult times, providing the encouragement and resources needed to overcome obstacles and emerge stronger.

                    But how do you build connections? Let alone, how do you keep it? Does it really matter who you know? And truthfully, do you see the people you meet as someone you could take advantage of in the future for your own benefit?

                    Building connections often starts with genuine communication and finding common ground with others. It involves reaching out, showing interest in someone else’s experiences, and being open to new perspectives. Keeping connections, on the other hand, requires investment and effort – staying in touch, supporting each other, and being there in both good and challenging times. It’s about building a foundation of trust and reliability. Does it really matter who you know? While it’s important to develop a network of connections, what matters most is the quality of those connections rather than simply the quantity. Meaningful, authentic connections often lead to valuable opportunities and support. And truthfully, do you see the people you meet as someone you could take advantage of in the future for your own benefit? Genuine connections are based on mutual respect and understanding, not on exploiting others for personal gain. It’s more productive to focus on building relationships that are rooted in trust, empathy, and mutual support, rather than solely seeking personal advantage.

                    To really build your network, you have to help. Everyone that comes into your life will need help and you must enable yourself to be able to help them, any way you can, as much as you can, to overcome their problems, challenges, and difficulties.

                    This assistance can take various forms, such as providing emotional support, sharing your knowledge and expertise, giving practical advice, or simply being a good listener. By actively engaging in offering aid to others, you not only strengthen your relationships and connections but also create an environment of reciprocity where help flows naturally in both directions. Furthermore, being a source of support for others can lead to personal growth and development, as it challenges you to empathize with different perspectives and find creative solutions to diverse problems. Therefore, by embracing a proactive attitude of helping, you not only enrich your network but also foster a culture of mutual assistance and empowerment.

                    It is not about thinking that you can use, for the lack of a better term, the person for your own personal gain. If you are thinking that way, stop. All of us carry our own cross. We should start thinking about how we can be of service to anyone who needs it.

                    It’s crucial to recognize the humanity in others and approach every interaction with empathy and kindness. Instead of seeking personal gain, we should strive to uplift and support those around us, fostering a culture of compassion and understanding. We should start thinking about how we can be of service to anyone who needs it, extending our hands and hearts to offer assistance, guidance, or simply a listening ear. By shifting our focus from self-interest to communal well-being, we can create a more harmonious and caring environment for everyone.

                    The people you will know will remember you

                    When my former work colleagues contact me offering me a better job, I honestly get surprised. Why? Because I just worked with them before and we are not really close. We don’t really know anything about each other’s families or each other’s past ordeals. But when I talk to them, they will always say they remember the work I did to help them manage their own responsibilities and think I could help them again.

                    This kind of unexpected recognition and appreciation makes me reflect on the impact I had at my previous workplace. It’s a reminder that the efforts I put into my work, even if not immediately recognized, can leave a positive impression on others. It’s a testament to the importance of professionalism and dedication in any work environment.

                    Looking back, I always take pride in my work. I always put enough effort relative to the need. What they need is what I provide and a little bit more, in case they need more. And that I believe helped them deliver and perform in their own roles.

                    I consistently strive to go above and beyond the requirements, anticipating any additional needs that may arise. By providing not only what is asked for, but also offering extra support and resources, I aim to ensure that all necessary bases are covered. This approach has proven beneficial, as it has contributed to the success and effectiveness of those I work with, enabling them to excel in their own roles.

                    Go help

                    Building and keeping your connection is all about being of service to other people. When we put ourselves aside to extend a hand to others, it brings a sense of fulfillment. Helping to the extent of our abilities and resources is a must in this world. Without expecting anything in return, we create a cycle of being there for one another.

                    By consistently offering our assistance and support to those around us, we not only nurture these relationships but also experience a profound sense of purpose and satisfaction. It is essential to contribute to the well-being of others to the best of our abilities and within our means. This selfless approach fosters a positive cycle of mutual support and care, where individuals are devoted to aiding one another without any expectation of personal gain, ultimately creating a more compassionate and connected world.

                  • The disadvantages of underpromising and overdelivering

                    The disadvantages of underpromising and overdelivering

                    What are the benefits of underpromising and overdelivering? Surprisingly, not so much.

                    I saw a post on Facebook about overdelivering on a promise that does not bring any additional rewards or benefits. It mentioned that it was stated by a 2014 study. I asked for that research and I received the link to the article with links to the study.

                    Upon further reading it, it got me thinking about how this study affects what is prevalent in any organization. That we are taught to underpromise and overdeliver on our tasks. That even performance metrics and performance scorecards have ratings that meet expectations and exceeding expectations built into them. That we are built to deliver more than what is expected from us and in effect, we show our potential to climb up the corporate ladder.

                    So, how could this study done about 10 years ago change the way we think about work? What’s more, how could it change the way we build strong relationships with one another? Is this really the way to go?

                    Known benefits of overdelivering

                    Before we go into how overdelivering does not give additional merits, let’s look first at the known benefits of underpromising and overdelivering:

                    • Being recognized. When we underpromise and overdeliver, we create a bit of surprise for our recipients. Since we give more than what we had promised, our names get ingrained in their brains. This creates a positive impact especially if the recipient is someone who is high up the corporate ladder. Our names could come up in the next promotion cycle.
                    • Monetary value. Organizations have established their own ways to measure the performance of every employee. There are metrics that need to be met and if you exceed the metrics, we score higher. For most companies offering monetary incentives, scoring higher is equivalent to higher bonuses. This is very impactful, especially for those with minimum wages and are relying heavily on those high bonuses that they could spend come December.
                    • Known reliability. Every person in an organization has their go-to person and the work gets tough. And since we have been overdelivering, people always look for us, or even up to us, for help and guidance. Establishing our names by producing more than what is expected makes us the person people always rely on.

                    These are some of the benefits of underpromising and overdelivering. For these to become a reality, the organization must know how to set realistic goals and exceed them. This can be done by creating a benchmark that could be based on industry-wide performance or the current company performance and setting a target higher than the current level to drive better results.

                    Now, knowing those benefits, let us now look at what the study said about how overdelivering may not be really beneficial.

                    Meeting and exceeding are just the same

                    I am not an expert on how the study was conducted, who conducted it, or for what purpose but feel free to check out this article entitled “Just keep your promises: Going above and beyond does not pay off“. I’ll just cite here my thoughts on the study and based on my experience, there could be some truth to it.

                    The effects are the same when we deliver a promise or exceed it. The study showed that. There are tests conducted that the feelings and reactions are the same when we meet or exceed expectations. But not delivering on a promise is detrimental.

                    Look at how your organization operates. Look at how people interact with each other. Try to notice if doing more work really works out for you. Has it or has it not?

                    I worked before with a person who continued to do more than what was expected of him. Nobody told him to do so. He just wanted to do more because he knew that if he did not anticipate things ahead of time before being told or asked to fix them, it would pile up. That he did not like. So he continued to perform better than the rest.

                    But he was denied of any promotion. He was always part of the discussion about appraisals and next in line for promotion but never got it. This is due to the fact that there are others who were prioritized before him. And when we looked at the performance of those who were promoted, they were just meeting the expected performance.

                    Another time when I created an entire process for another company I worked for and our vice president was happy about it as it is something they were looking for. But, when ranking came up, i was not considered at the top 10 and only those who had performed as expected were ranked higher.

                    Underpromising and overdelivering is a strategy for managing expectations and delivering value. That is the keyword – value. And the value is subjective at times. What some consider valuable for them may not be the same for others. Additionally, it could diminish over time. The impact you had made on that moment may long be forgotten by the time the appraisal discussion starts or overshadowed by someone who had met the value others had been looking for.

                    Avoid underpromising and overdelivering

                    The study cites that when we meet the expectations of the people around us, we are more happy compared to not meeting them. Well, that is true. Doing otherwise negatively affects our integrity.

                    But, exceeding them does not create any extra happiness. It does not give us the feeling of being great that we have received more than what we expected. We may be thankful, sure, but we do not become so overjoyed.

                    Now, you may think that when you are expecting something, like someone attending your birthday that you did not expect to come, then suddenly that person showed up, did you really have set your mind to accept that the person will not arrive? Or hoping still that he or she will grace you with his or her presence? Are you really overjoyed because you are not expecting the person anymore or your wish has come true which is still your expectation, subconsciously?

                    The study makes a good argument. I am inclined to agree with it. Meeting expectations creates value for the one receiving it. Exceeding it, not so much. Not delivering, well you are one not to be trusted anymore (e.g. just like when you committed to finish a task by a certain deadline and were not able to) and therefore, lose any opportunity to work with the person whose trust you broke.

                    What’s more is that underpromising and overdelivering may compromise our integrity and if we fail to do it consistently, we lose the trust. Or if we do it consistently, people will always expect more from us. So, when will it stop?

                    As I end, let us all think about this. This is not about overdelivering on a promise. It is about keeping it. It requires us to be true to our word and just that, no more. We do not need to be more. We just need to be enough. We just need to produce enough.

                  • Doubt to be succesful

                    Doubt to be succesful

                    Doubt is sometimes said to kill more dreams than failure ever will. However, doubting could help us be successful if we harness it the right way.

                    “We have to trust each other to survive!”

                    “No. We have to doubt to survive.”

                    These are subtitles from the two characters in Pending Train. Pending Train is a Japanese show being shown on Netflix. It is about a group of people who were transported to the future aboard a car five of the train. In the future, they work together to survive, remember who they left in the past and figure out a way back home.

                    The dialogue got me interested as there is some truth to it in how we deal with our lives. We put our trust in others hoping and expecting that things will go as we wanted. At the same time, we also have doubts and skepticism about how people are which makes us very wary of how things will proceed thus, we make other plans to ensure what we envision happens.

                    We can actually combine both lines of thinking. How? Let me tell you a story first.

                    Not meeting expectations

                    There was this one time at work when I was leading a team of analysts and our regular deliverable was to provide reports and analysis. The very purpose of the work is to provide timely reports, analysis and data presentation to ensure that the leadership makes the right strategy and decision in running the business.

                    With a team, a lot of things could go awry. There would be some who would deliver their work early or on time, some would not be able to complete it for whatever reasons, and some would be absent until the deadline has past.

                    One of the supervisors in my team came to me and raised a concern about his subordinate. His subordinate was always delivering mediocre results and was not coming to work for different reasons resulting for work be done by him instead.

                    He mentioned that he talked to the person and had issued reprimand letters however, his subordinate continued to be the way he was. He was getting annoyed as he did not know what to do. All of his work had been dumped on my supervisor.

                    If he had done everything he must do like coaching, feedback, reprimand letters, and sanctions, then the expectation should be what the person regularly delivers. This means that there is not much my supervisor could do, aside from terminating him, but to expect that the work would probably be the same output as what he had been delivering.

                    Expect not to receive your expectations

                    At work, we interact with a lot of people. We collaborate with them on different tasks. Most of our output will depend on how others will accomplish theirs and vice versa. Interdependency would mean either a great output or a failure. And most of the time, it does not get isolated who should have done what. The output of the work remains yours alone.

                    When people collaborate, it is wise to consider what to expect from the person. Expect that the person will deliver or not will entirely depend on his or her previous work behavior. When we know that a person can deliver a certain level of output, we can then expect that it would be the same for most collaborative work.

                    Knowing this, we all have to adjust our expectations. We can not hope that a person will change, especially overnight. If that person will change, it will take time and a fair amount of effort to provide guidance and help. However, in the immediate present, we should consider what the person can realistically deliver based on what he or she has been delivering so far.

                    Trust is required at work. Without it, a team can not function. It will make people in a team feel unwanted or lose their sense of belongingness. This in turn could be detrimental to the team’s output and performance.

                    Although, doubt should also be in place. Not that we doubt each and every one but more like doubting if the plan will work and if each and everyone assigned to each task will do what is expected of them. By having doubt, a plan B can be created and salvage the work of the team.

                    “Plan A does not always work.”

                    That is another line from the Pending Train show. It was from the woman CEO who have been successful in running her company that she always have Plan B as part of her strategy.

                    At work, and in life, we all have a strategy to achieve what we want. Work, earn, save, and maybe retire rich. Get promoted, have more money, and retire rich. And then, life gets in the way. Someone got sick, someone got into an accident, or something else that would destroy your path to success.

                    While it is good to bounce back after any challenges life throws us, it is also good to have a backup plan. A safety net that you could fall into without hitting the ground.

                    Same for work, knowing and understanding what our colleagues are capable of, we could further create a strategy that will minimize the risks of not completing our work. This way, we have anticipated what could happen and made our plans around it.

                    Trust people based on who they are. Doubt what could probably happen and do something else to mitigate the impact of risk. By doing so, we still are able to collaborate effectively and at the same time, avoiding any major pitfalls that could affect our output and performance.

                    Be better than yesterday.

                  • Stay in your comfort zone

                    Stay in your comfort zone

                    Staying in our comfort zone is always frowned upon when it comes to being successful in life. Although, there might be a different way to look at it that being in your comfort zone may help achieve your goals.

                    A different take

                    I saw this book on the Blinkist app entitled The Comfort Zone. It was written by Kristen Butler. She is the CEO and founder of Power of Positivity whose aim is to provide life lessons that help people live their best life.

                    What caught my attention to reading the blink is what it mentioned in the introduction:

                    “…bust the age-old myth that growth only happens outside the comfort zone…”

                    Something different, right?

                    We have all been hearing that the only way to grow and be successful is to get out of our comfort zone and experience the unknown. And the benefits of leaving your comfort zone outweigh the cost if you stay inside. There are various theories, books, TED talks, and other activities and examples that are related to this.

                    With all the benefits of being outside your comfort zone, staying inside it is something that may bring us disadvantages, and worse, lose opportunities to grow and achieve what we want.

                    That is why this blink (I am yet to purchase the book) is very interesting. What could staying in our comfort zone bring us that could help us be successful? Why would keeping within the zone be beneficial for our growth and well-being? And, lastly, how could going beyond it hurt us?

                    Before we go any further, let us define the meaning of comfort zone.

                    What is comfort zone?

                    Wikipedia defines comfort zone as “…a familiar psychological state where people are at ease and (perceive they are) in control of their environment, experiencing low levels of anxiety and stress.” In simple words, it is a state of mind where you perceive at ease with your situation and environment.

                    To better illustrate, here are general examples of a comfort zone that most of us experience;

                    • Staying at home or at your work where you feel safe, at ease, and without any stress.
                    • Avoiding arguments that challenge your belief, therefore, staying with people who share the same opinion.
                    • A regular routine that minimizes your risks like taking the same route to work
                    • Doing the same work that you know how and not open to doing anything else.

                    These are just general examples. However, comfort zone is different for everyone. Some may be comfortable listening to a speaker while some are comfortable delivering the speech. Some may be comfortable expressing their thoughts through writing and some may be comfortable with getting into a ring and having a fight with someone. There are also some who rather work behind the scenes and there are some who are more at ease facing clients and delivering sales or progress presentations.

                    It is different for everyone. What could be too easy for some may be too difficult for others causing them anxiety and stress which is outside their comfort zone.

                    This is why staying in the comfort zone impedes growth and in effect, reduces the chance of success in life.

                    Going out of your comfort zone means trying something new. It is about doing something else that you have not done before. It is about pushing yourself, making an effort, and experiencing the unknown to you. In the process, you learn a thing or two. These learnings become your knowledge that you could use in the future. As a result, you have expanded your comfort zone and may be ready to tackle new things. Growth comes. Success comes.

                    So, if that is the case, it is good to leave what is known to you as it makes you a better person. However, staying with what you know, where you are comfortable, can also lead you to a happy and successful life.

                    Knowing this may turn your life around.

                    When it is not for you

                    I started my career as a customer service representative in one of the biggest BPO companies here in the Philippines. After a year, I was accepted to become a workforce analyst. For those who do not know what a workforce analyst does, our main function is to ensure that the right people are providing service to the customers at the right time. That is the very just of it but it has a lot of math behind it.

                    For 20 years, I have been doing this line of work and have been promoted many times up to director level. I enjoy what I do especially translating everything into numbers and seeing projections happen as a big part of what I do is to assume what could happen in the future and plan around it. Everything was well and good until I got promoted to director level. This is when everything fell apart.

                    The scope took me away from the groundwork. It created a big space between me and our rank and file. There was a time when people started calling me “sir” and started giving me special treatments. No one was willing to talk to me about what was really happening. And from what I gathered, most would take my simple sentence as a command instead of them arguing about it and giving me their input.

                    I became very uncomfortable.

                    I also started learning financials. My task was to manage the revenue. It is to ensure that what we aim for as target revenue for the quarter is met. It became all about money. All about monetary value. All about getting more from the current workforce.

                    This added to my anxiety and stress.

                    While learning these new things was great, it also was something I was not at ease to do. I lost the connection I had with people solving their problems. I lost the science and art I used to apply at work and it all became about increasing the company’s value. Additionally, the work required long hours which I never liked.

                    This is when I stopped and turned back to where I was comfortable.

                    Not all growth is an advantage

                    This is why I am interested in reading Kristen Butler’s book. I have first-hand experience of staying in what I know, where am I comfortable, a place where I feel at ease can also help me be successful in life. All of these are avoiding unnecessary anxiety, stress, and unwanted feelings and emotions.

                    In my new work right now, I am still learning a lot. I am pushed to do more than what is expected of me. However, I am comfortable with the demands of work, the stress that seems absent, and the work culture we have.

                    Staying in our comfort zone can still make us grow. I think it is just exerting a little effort to slowly expand it that could contribute to our well-being and help us be successful. Putting too much strain on ourselves which is brought by the fast-paced world could backfire and hurt us in the long run.

                    Do what you are comfortable to do. Do not get pulled by others who compete just to get ahead. Focus on what you want to do. In the end, they will not matter and only what you consider important is of value.

                  • Reversed Effort | More sometimes is less and worse

                    Reversed Effort | More sometimes is less and worse

                    The law of reversed effort means the more you directly pursue a goal, the less likely you are to achieve it. It just means that when you focus on the wrong thing, or doing too much, it could hinder your progress. Doing more may not be the way to do it. Just enough would take you there.

                    We all want to do more.

                    We all want to have more. We always want to have something better. Something better than what we have. It is always about becoming better. Be better in life. Be better at work. Be better at what we do.

                    It seems that we are never content with what we have. Even if we are grateful and thankful, we always look for something more. We are always in the search of something better. And while we treasure what we have, there comes a point in our lives that we want some changes. We want something else.

                    With this thinking, we try to get more of what we have. We even try to do more than what we are able to perform in the present. We think that by doing more, we can get more. A typical example is when we squeeze more tasks in our time. More tasks thinking we can do it in a limited time. Attend more meetings thinking that there may be important information or discussion in the meeting that we need to know. Take on more projects with the hope that we get noticed and get that promotion that we have been eyeing for.

                    However, doing more sometimes is doing less. What’s worse is that by doing more, it may lead to results that we do not want such as mediocre performance at work, inability to complete most tasks within deadline, and, sometimes, being paralyzed as we are overwhelmed with things we need to do.

                    The law of reversed effort which was coined by Aldous Huxley says:

                    “The harder we try with the conscious will to do something, the less we shall succeed.

                    “Proficiency and the results of proficiency come only to those who have learned the paradoxical art of doing and not doing, or combining relaxation with activity, of letting go as a person in order that the immanent and transcendent unknown quantity may take hold.”

                    The harder we try, the less we succeed.

                    That has a nice ring to it. We are not aware of this but, when look back in your life, or just simply at work. The more effort you give to push yourself in completing a task, the more you are not able to complete it.

                    My introduction may seem different compared to the law of reversed effort but let me further explain.

                    At work, we have a lot of things to do. And our general thinking is that we want to finish it as soon as possible because, well, there are a lot. We may see the end of it but we know that work will keep coming so in effect we try to finish it and even spend more time just to clear it out of our plates.

                    And again, repeating myself and combining it with the law of reversed effort, the more we do, the more effort we give, the less outcome will it be. By pushing ourselves too much, by taking on more than what we could realistically handle, by squeezing every second in our time, we only produce less. We create less.

                    Notice the following at work:

                    • Having more than three things to complete on a daily basis. Were you able to finish beyond three tasks that you could say to yourself you are satisfied with what you have produced? Was there a time that when you completed three things you planned out to do on a certain brought you a little bit of peace and a sense of fulfillment?
                    • Staring at the data and trying to figure it out for hours. Have you had the time when you are trying to think and understand what the numbers on the report is telling you and even after hours and hours of trying to understand it, you really can not figure it out?
                    • Attending a meeting for long to make a decision. What a waste of time, right? All the bright people in a room (or virtual call) trying to come up with a solution and nothing comes up. All of you have racked your brains but still can not find a workable solution to a problem.

                    There are other scenarios at work that uses more effort and time that does not really give the desired results. And with the fast-paced world we live in, no one stops, even though they want to. No one wants to take a pause, even if they have to. No one wants to take a step back even if that is what is needed to see the bigger picture and come up with the results.

                    Stop. Pause. Take a breath.

                    There is no need to run a sprint. It is not a marathon either. It should not be a race. It is not about who finishes first. It is just about getting to where you want to go. We all need to regularly stop, pause and take a breath so we have the strength to keep moving forward towards our goals.

                    If we continue do more beyond what we could really do, if we continue to take on more beyond our realistic capacity, if we keep giving more effort without pausing to take a breath, we will all just produce undesired result. In effect, it is detrimental to ourselves and to others.

                    One colleague of mine a couple of years back said, “We can only ask the people to do overtime up to such time without impacting the quality of their work. Eventually, they will tire. No one will do it even with cash incentives and the quality of work will suffer.”

                    He is right. It did happen. After a few weeks, no one volunteered for overtime even if the cash incentive is twice as high as before. What’s more, those who did rendered extra time were not able to come to work because they got sick. As additional effect, more work needs to be completed, and the quality suffered.

                    So, don’t push yourself to do more because you will only do less. Don’t give too much effort because it will only create mediocre results. Don’t take on more than what you can handle as it will only make you complete close to nothing.

                  • Your understanding of time management is wrong

                    Your understanding of time management is wrong

                    Time management is basically about allocating time for specific tasks and being efficient. But once we are efficient, it does not mean that we should be doing more. The free time we gain can be time to rest, not to do more.

                    Our daily routine

                    You start your day at work. You look at your to-do list. You look at your calendar. And after all of these, you feel you want to do all of it in one day. Have it all done. But that rarely happens.

                    You plan out your day. You slowly go through that list. Work on it. Attend meetings. Talk and chat to other people. Respond to emails. And so on. At the end of the day, it feels like you have not completed what you wanted.

                    You wanted to apply the concept of time management. Other articles told you that it is task management because you can not really manage time. You start scheduling your tasks and meetings but still, at the end of a work week, it still feels like nothing has been accomplished. There is no sense of fulfillment.

                    Why is that? Are we really applying time management effectively (or are we even doing it right?)

                    Misunderstanding time management

                    The concept behind time management is simply for us to be able to maximize our time. We manage our time so we can do what we need to do. Time is allocated to specific tasks that we need to complete. In effect, we are able to accomplish what we set out to do on any given day.

                    However, we misunderstood the real concept behind time management. While we all want to maximize our time to do more or become more efficient, what happens is we fill in all of our time with tasks. Tasks that may be important for us to do or tasks that we do not want to be put off for later therefore utilizing our time close to 100%. What happens after doing this is we get burned out and are not effective in some of our tasks.

                    “In all of these instances, the solution isn’t to become more efficient to accommodate more tasks, more decisions, and more distractions. The imperative is clear: simplify. Reduce the number of tasks you take on, replace decisions with principles, and put structure in place to eliminate distractions.”

                    This excerpt is from an article written by Dane Jensen for Harvard Business Review. It is titled “Time Management Won’t Save You”. The article provides good guides in order for us to really apply time management in our work and our lives. Feel free to read it. After that, below is what we should be considering before we start managing our time.

                    Basic principle

                    Think of what is important for you. Is it delivering the best outcome at work? Is it spending more time with your family? Is it living a comfortable life? Is it doing good for others? Whatever it is, isolate it.

                    Once you have determined that, consider all the tasks you need to do and how they help you exhibit what is important to you. Will doing a task mean it will give you a comfortable life, success at work, better relationship with your loved ones, etc.? If so, prioritize those.

                    Goal oriented

                    What is your goal? What do you want to achieve? Will doing the task take you closer to it? Will it help you be successful on your own terms?

                    Define your end. When you have that visualized, clear, and written somewhere, it will help guide you in managing your time. Does talking to chatty colleagues help you build the reports or presentations or will it help you build relationships? What is your end goal?

                    Three tasks

                    We all have a list of tasks that we need to complete at work and at home. Looking at it becomes overwhelming and causes us not to do anything. The same effect as analysis paralysis brings. Isolate three things that are time-sensitive and important. Then, do those three things only. Any other tasks are to be done on another day.

                    By doing so, you will direct your time and energy to an acceptable level of work. Completing those three tasks, which should be aligned with your principles and help you get closer to your goal, will give you a sense of fulfillment and happiness.

                    Free up

                    Don’t fill all of your time with tasks. If you have scheduled the three tasks, have some meetings scheduled at work, errands at home, and still have free time, do not fill it with tasks. Let it be free. Let be a moment for you to do nothing. Or even a moment to do leisure stuff whatever comes into your mind.

                    We are not machines. We are not robots. We need rest. We need a downtime. The mind and body use that time to recharge and adjust for what lies ahead. If we do not give it time to recuperate (sleeping is not the only way), we will not be effective. The law of reversed effort explains that. (I’ll share that at another time).

                    It is not about using all of it.

                    Time is an illusion. It is a concept created by man. It makes our lives easier, in a sense, as it creates a sense of order in an ever-changing world.

                    While we want to maximize our time to do more by being efficient and effective, most of the time it hurts us. It drains us. It takes away everything we have. It makes our lives miserable.

                    However, if we leave some room to do nothing and manage our time by allocating time to do the tasks that are aligned with what we believe in, what is important to us, and what helps us get closer to our goals, then we are effectively managing our time.

                    Manage time

                    Managing is properly allocating resources. By time management, it means allocating time to do our tasks. The challenge for us is what tasks to allocate time to. And that is where knowing your goal, what is important, and what you believe in will help you effectively manage your time.

                    Be more purposeful. Leave some room to recuperate. When your time is used for tasks that matter and bring value together with enough time to do nothing and just rest, you will always have the strength to move forward and become better than you were yesterday.