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MY EXPERIENCE | MY EXPERTISE

Tag: experience

  • Your story is your legacy

    Your story is your legacy

    Our legacy is from our story. The actions we took. The impact we made. What we leave behind is what happens to those who we have impacted the most.

    When you are gone, what do you want people to say about you? What are you living behind? How do you want to live your life before you die?

    In your every waking hour, in your ever-busy life, are you aware of the impact it will have on other people? Will whoever you are now be remembered by at least the people around you? Are you living a life to your own selfish desires or towards the betterment of humankind as a society?

    In every waking hour and amidst the hustle and bustle of our daily lives, it’s crucial to pause and reflect on the impact our actions will have on those around us. Will our presence be remembered positively by the people in our immediate circles? Will our legacy be one of self-centered pursuits, or will it be marked by contributions toward the advancement and well-being of society as a whole? These questions compel us to consider the greater purpose of our existence and the mark we leave on the world. Taking a moment to evaluate the direction of our lives can lead to a deeper understanding of our roles within the broader tapestry of humanity, motivating us to strive for a legacy that transcends mere self-serving desires.

    Take a step back and review what happened to your day yesterday. For us who are working for a company, our typical day would be to get up, grab a coffee, scroll through social media, play some mobile games, get a shower, watch TV, go to work, eat lunch or dinner, end our day, and sleep The following day we repeat it.

    The daily routine for many working individuals often involves a sequence of familiar activities that provide comfort and structure. It begins with waking up and indulging in a cup of freshly brewed coffee, which serves as a catalyst for the day ahead. This may be followed by a leisurely scroll through social media, offering a glimpse into the lives of friends, family, and perhaps, one’s favorite celebrities. The routine may then transition to a casual session of mobile gaming, providing a brief escape from the demands of the day. After these moments of relaxation, it’s time to freshen up with a rejuvenating shower, preparing for the day either at work or at home.

    At work, the day unfolds with various tasks, meetings, and interactions, interspersed with the much-anticipated lunch break or, for those working into the evening, a satisfying dinner. These meals serve as a pause, allowing individuals to recharge and refuel for the remaining hours of their workday. Finally, as the day draws to a close, there might be time to unwind in front of the TV, catch up on favorite shows, or wind down with a movie.

    Reflecting on this perpetual cycle of activities, it becomes apparent that each day carries its own blend of familiarity and unique moments, providing the opportunity to find joy, fulfillment, and recharge before embarking on the next day’s adventures.

    Maybe once in a while, we go out with friends. Maybe during the weekends, we go out with our families. Maybe sometime in the year, we take a vacation. Maybe some other days, we go to some events like concerts, food halls, or anything else. Or maybe attend some grand family events like weddings, birthdays, funerals, etc.

    If we take a step back, get to higher ground, and look at our lives from a bird’s eye view, what do we realize have we done with our lives? Do we think it is something worth remembering? Have we made a significant impact on the lives of others? What are we leaving to the world and generations to come?

    These introspective questions prod us to reflect on the legacy we are creating with our existence. Often, the hustle and bustle of daily life obstructs our ability to pause and ponder the broader implications of our actions. However, a moment of contemplation can unravel profound insights. As we review the mosaic of our journey, we unearth the footprints we’ve etched into the tapestry of time. Each act of kindness, every endeavor, and the relationships we nurture contribute to the narrative of our lives.

    The weight of our actions is not solely determined by their scale, but rather by the sincerity and impact they carry. Whether we have touched lives through simple gestures of compassion or through grand initiatives, the significance lies in the genuineness of our intentions. An empathetic ear, a helping hand extended in times of need, or a heartfelt word of encouragement can reverberate through the lives of others, creating a ripple effect that transcends generations.

    Considering what we impart to the world, the question arises: what inheritance are we bequeathing to posterity? Our actions, values, and the wisdom we impart to future generations lay the foundation for the world that will greet them. Thus, in our quest to craft a meaningful existence, we are not merely sculpting our own story, but also shaping the narrative of the world to come. It is within these reflections that we find the impetus to infuse our lives with purpose and altruism, striving to leave behind a legacy that enriches the tapestry of humanity.”

    My mother-in-law passed away a year ago. And hearing stories about her from her sisters, she seemed to live a life like of a superhero. She saved them from every unfortunate event that happened to them. And she continued to do that with her children. She did everything she could to give them a fighting chance in life. While she succumbed to her sickness and was not able to do much for her grandchildren, her legacy to us was that.

    She was suffering and made it known at the end, but before that, her pain was not known to anyone. She kept going until she really couldn’t anymore. Until her powers ran out and the only thing she left was the memory that even if a person has taken a bad road, she will still extend help as much as she can, even if it meant pain.

    So for us still living now, what could we consider a legacy? I haven’t figured it out myself but I think, for now, I would follow in some of her footsteps – help others to stand and fight on their own and live their lives as they want to. Maybe make a superhero of everyone.

    The idea of leaving a legacy is a profound contemplation for anyone still living. What constitutes a legacy may vary from person to person, but for some, it involves following in the footsteps of those who have come before us, particularly those who have exhibited qualities of empowerment and compassion. In this context, it can be about empowering others to stand on their own and pursue their aspirations freely. It’s about fostering a sense of autonomy and self-determination, essentially transforming everyday individuals into their own kind of superheroes. This can manifest in various forms, from mentorship and support to activism and advocacy, ultimately striving to create a world where everyone has the opportunity to thrive as their authentic selves.

    In the end, superheroes die. But their death meant the worst is over. The villain is gone. Those who are left are to battle their own villain. And emulating her superhero act, I think it would be very helpful to leave a legacy of people who can be superheroes too.

  • Flexibility is not availability

    Flexibility is not availability

    Flexibility is not availability. Being flexible at work usually means being available all the time. This may not be the right meaning.

    Does it really mean being available when needed? When you say you are highly flexible, does that equate to being able to attend to other people’s concerns all the time? When is enough?

    When you are interviewed for a job, one of the usual questions is about being highly flexible. You immediately say yes thinking that it could not be bad and that you can still negotiate your time. Well, most of the time, you are wrong.

    Flexibility in the workplace is often presented as a desirable trait, and it’s understandable why many would readily agree to be highly flexible during a job interview. The initial allure of appearing accommodating and adaptable can overshadow the potential implications and demands of such an agreement. While the intention may be to retain a sense of control over one’s time, the reality can often be quite different.

    Agreeing to high flexibility without fully understanding the scope and expectations can lead to challenges in maintaining a healthy work-life balance. It’s crucial to engage in open communication with employers regarding the specifics of flexibility and to negotiate terms that align with personal needs and boundaries. True flexibility should involve a reciprocal understanding and respect for both the employee and the employer, promoting a harmonious and sustainable work environment.

    It’s important for individuals to approach the concept of flexibility with a discerning mindset, recognizing the potential impact on their daily lives and well-being. Open dialogue and clear parameters can help transform the concept of flexibility from a potential source of stress into a mutually beneficial arrangement.

    When asked about flexibility, it only means that you are expected to be working when you are asked to work. For rank and file, it could only mean changing shifts, especially in a BPO setting. For managerial positions, it is totally different. The expectations are higher. You will be receiving messages on your personal numbers and the expectation is for you to respond, may it be just for a simple question or something bigger that you need to attend to, even if it is not your regular working hours yet.

    The concept of flexibility in the workplace extends beyond simply being available to work when asked. When discussing flexibility, especially within the framework of a BPO setting, it often pertains to the ability to adjust shifts for individuals in rank-and-file positions. This can involve accommodating changes in work schedules to meet the operational demands of the business.

    In contrast, for employees in managerial positions, the expectations around flexibility take on a different dimension. It often involves being reachable on personal contact numbers, and the expectation to respond promptly, whether it’s a simple query or a more substantial matter that requires attention, even outside of regular working hours. The level of responsibility and accountability in such roles can lead to a more encompassing scope of flexibility, where the demands of the position may transcend typical working hours.

    Whether it’s adapting to shifting schedules or being available for critical communication and decision-making outside of regular working hours, the concept of flexibility in the modern workplace encompasses a diverse set of expectations across different levels of the organizational hierarchy.

    The pandemic has brought work from the office setting to our homes. And while this is beneficial for a lot of people as time and effort from commuting has been reduced, the concept of flexibility has taken a different turn. Since you are at home, maybe doing nothing, maybe you could do the work right there and then. Anyway, you already saved time from commuting, not to mention preparing to go to work, and you could use that time to get some work done.

    Flexibility is not the same as availability. It is not the same as being available all the time. To me, it only means that you have the freedom to make necessary adjustments in your daily routines and schedules as how you see it fit in your personal life. Adjusting and moving things around to attend to your priorities should be the core principle when we think about flexibility.

    The concept of flexibility holds significant value in our daily lives. It’s important to highlight that flexibility is not synonymous with constant availability. It does not imply being at someone’s beck and call consistently. Instead, it embodies the freedom to adapt and modify our daily routines and schedules in a manner that aligns with our personal lives. This freedom allows us to make necessary adjustments, ensuring that we can attend to our priorities and responsibilities effectively. Embracing flexibility entails being able to maneuver and allocate time and resources in a way that resonates with our individual needs and aspirations, thus fostering a healthier balance between our personal and professional endeavors.

    If your priority is work, so be it. If your priority is your family, so be it. To each his own. But being available all the time to attend to other people’s concerns is not flexibility. Living your life so you can be ordered around and do what you are told to is not how I see life should be.

    It’s important to establish boundaries and prioritize what truly matters to you. Sometimes, it’s necessary to take a step back and reassess how we spend our time and energy. We all have our unique priorities and responsibilities, and it’s essential to honor those while also maintaining a sense of autonomy and self-determination. Striking a balance between meeting the needs of others and preserving our own agency is crucial for a fulfilling life. Ultimately, finding harmony between our obligations and personal aspirations is key to leading a life aligned with our values and desires. Embracing this perspective can empower us to live authentically and with purpose, contributing to a sense of contentment and fulfillment.”

    Be available to do what your priorities are. Be flexible enough to adjust to what the chaotic world is giving you. Being available is not being flexible. Be flexible to be available for the things that really matter to you.

  • Micromanaging your team

    Micromanaging your team

    When could you consider trusting your team and letting them do what needs to be done? What is fast enough in delivering output and when do you step in?

    Is micromanaging your team your daily approach?

    A typical day of yours as a leader usually starts with emails and coordinating with your team to get things done. With a million things on your plate, you start handing out assignments to each member of your team. And throughout the day, either you let them be and do your own tasks or connect with some of them to know the status of the work.

    While your subordinate’s typical day would be almost the same, they will do what you asked for and everything else on their daily plate. And during the course of their day, instead of them taking a break, they speak with you to discuss progress on your ask. If you are not satisfied, you ask for more and they do it again almost at the end of their shift which results in them doing more hours and almost having the same hours as you do.

    In one of your discussions with one subordinate, you give specific instructions on how to do this and that – where to put the data, what color, what table size, and so on – while watching them do it over a virtual meeting.

    And your subordinate feels uneasy because of the pressure you are giving them because instead of them doing it and figuring it out, you are there, watching them, how they do things, and calling out every mistake or everything that is not to your liking.

    Micromanaging is a result of two things – a leader’s need to be right all the time and a subordinate’s procrastination.

    A leader will always micromanage because the subordinate would not deliver it right or on time. It becomes a question of the ability of the person to deliver. If that person continues not to produce the desired result on time, the leader would be watching everything the subordinate does. While this is very stressful, it is sometimes the result of the subordinate’s behavior.

    A leader’s inclination to micromanage often stems from a lack of confidence in the subordinate’s ability to deliver work on time and according to expectations. When a team member consistently fails to meet deadlines or produce the desired results, a leader may feel compelled to closely monitor their work. While this approach can create a stressful and tense working environment, it may unfortunately be a consequence of the subordinate’s consistent behavior. In such cases, it’s crucial for both the leader and the team member to communicate openly and work together to address the root causes of the performance issues. Building trust and providing the necessary support can often lead to a more productive and harmonious working relationship.

    A subordinate will experience being micromanaged because the leader would want certain things to be done his or her way. The leader who thinks he or she knows better or since he or she has a higher position would always be right would tend to be looking for mistakes all the time and will prevent his or her team from growing.

    The experience of being micromanaged by a leader can be quite frustrating for a subordinate. This often occurs when the leader feels a strong need for things to be done in a specific way, typically their own way. Such leaders may believe that their position or knowledge entitles them to always be right, and this mindset can lead to a constant scrutiny for errors within their team. Unfortunately, this behavior can hinder the growth of the team, as it discourages independent thinking and initiative. The absence of autonomy and trust within the team can ultimately stifle creativity and productivity, creating a challenging environment for the entire group.

    A lot of articles that I have read talk about micromanaging as a faulty characteristic of a person in a leadership role. To me, it is a two-way street, and it all starts with trust. If the leader can not trust his or her subordinate because the latter is not producing the results needed, it will result in micromanaging. If the leader does not trust his or her subordinates because he or she thinks is better than them, then it would result too in micromanaging.

    Micromanaging indeed emerges as a prevalent issue discussed in leadership literature. It’s often depicted as a shortcoming, indicating a lack of trust in one’s team. However, upon closer examination, it becomes clear that the dynamics leading to micromanaging are multifaceted. At its core, the manifestation of micromanaging is contingent on the foundation of trust within the leadership-subordinate relationship.

    The concept of trust plays a pivotal role in preventing micromanaging tendencies. When a leader struggles to place trust in their subordinates due to perceived inadequacies in performance, the inclination to micromanage intensifies. Similarly, if a leader harbors an underlying belief of superiority over their team, this too can culminate in a propensity for micromanagement.

    Effectively addressing micromanaging involves fostering an environment of mutual respect and trust. It necessitates a clear delineation of responsibilities and expectations, along with open channels of communication. Furthermore, nurturing a culture where team members feel empowered to make decisions within their realm of work is crucial in mitigating the impulse to micromanage.

    In conclusion, the complexity of micromanaging in a leadership role underscores the need for holistic approaches that prioritize trust, clear communication, and mutual respect within a team’s dynamics. By addressing these underlying factors, leaders can cultivate an environment where micromanaging tendencies are minimized, thereby fostering a more cohesive and productive workspace.

    So, to you, the leader out there, do not put yourself on a pedestal. You are not better than your team. In any leadership role, it’s essential to remember that humility and empathy are key attributes. By recognizing and appreciating the diverse skills and perspectives of your team, you can foster a more inclusive and cohesive work environment. Leading by example and embracing collaboration can inspire greater trust and teamwork, ultimately leading to enhanced productivity and job satisfaction. Therefore, as a leader, it’s crucial to lead with humility and treat each team member with respect, valuing their contributions and creating space for open communication and growth.

    And, to you, the subordinate out there, be trustworthy enough that you produce the needed results. It is crucial for the effectiveness of the team that each member fulfills their responsibilities with trustworthiness and reliability. By maintaining these attributes, you contribute to the overall success of the group and the attainment of the desired outcomes. Your commitment to delivering the results required demonstrates your dedication and contributes to building a cohesive and efficient working environment. Therefore, always strive to uphold the trust placed in you and continually work towards meeting the expectations set for you.

    Stop blaming the leader. Stop blaming the subordinate. It is a two-way street.

  • Work to live not live to work

    Work to live not live to work

    How much time are you spending at your job? Does your whole world revolve around it? Is it about the money? Or are you just simply a workaholic?

    Do you work to live or live to work?

    The work won’t stop. Every day there would be something new. There would be something different to take care of. Your emails won’t stop pouring. Your messages won’t stop notifying you. People will always reach out because they need something. It will continue to come at you. It will never stop.

    At the onset of any interview, one basic question is about your willingness to work long hours. And since you need a job, you say yes. You say yes to most of the questions because you need the job. And once you get it, you pour in all your time, as much as you can, as you need the job. You need the money. It’s a common scenario for many people seeking employment, where the eagerness to secure a job leads them to make commitments they may later struggle to fulfill. The pressure to agree to long hours and other demands during the interview process can sometimes be overwhelming, especially when there is a strong need for employment. Once hired, the motivation to prove oneself and secure the job can drive individuals to dedicate extensive hours to their work, often at the expense of their personal time and well-being. It’s a delicate balance between the necessity of employment and maintaining a healthy work-life equilibrium.

    You’ll eventually see that there would be some promotions ahead and you start picturing yourself getting that fancy title, that fancy office, a team to lead, and calling the shots. You also think of the money you’ll get. The changes it will bring to you and your family. Along with a fancy title, you can afford nicer things in life. You get to buy better brands of clothes, and a car, eat at fine restaurants, and get a fancy vacation.

    The allure of career advancement often comes with vivid dreams of grandeur. Imagining oneself ascending to higher positions within the professional realm ignites a sense of anticipation and aspiration. The prospect of acquiring a prestigious title, commanding a distinguished office space, leading a team, and making influential decisions can be a source of great motivation. Additionally, the allure of financial gain looms large, inspiring contemplation of the potential impact on personal and familial circumstances.

    As one envisions the possibility of an elevated status, thoughts naturally drift toward the tangible improvements it could bring about in one’s lifestyle. This includes the ability to indulge in finer luxuries, such as upscale clothing brands, a luxurious vehicle, exquisite dining experiences, and opulent holiday retreats. These material aspirations interweave with broader professional ambitions, painting a compelling picture of success and fulfillment.

    All of these you can get, only if you dedicate most of your life working. Get noticed. Get promoted. Get more money. Get nicer things. Get a better life.

    And then after that, what’s next?

    You get to dream of retiring. Dream about enjoying the beach. Dream about spending time with your family and friends. Dream about relaxing and doing nothing. Waiting for the sun to set. Waiting for your final last breath.

    Is this how you picture your life? Is this how your life is now? Are you living to work and then die after that?

    Living to work is not worth it. We work so we can live. That is the basic premise. That is the foundation. That is it. It should not be the other way around. We should not be living to work.

    The premise of working to live, rather than living to work, emphasizes the fundamental value of prioritizing our lives and well-being over the demands of our work. This principle serves as the essential foundation upon which we build our approach to work and life. It underscores the notion that work is a means to support and enhance our lives, not the defining purpose of our existence. When we uphold this perspective, we acknowledge the importance of maintaining a balance between our professional endeavors and personal fulfillment. Ultimately, embracing the idea of working to live cultivates a healthier, more sustainable approach to life, allowing us to derive greater satisfaction and meaning from our experiences.

    Please take a look at your life now. Most people I had worked with got promoted and have been working long hours. They do get vacation sometimes but they also work during those times that they are on a beach, outside having fun with family or friends, playing sports, or just watching tv. In our ever-connected world, they are not truly offline.

    The pursuit of a balanced and fulfilling life is a noble endeavor that requires careful consideration. When evaluating your daily routine, it’s essential to assess whether the allocation of time and energy aligns with your long-term well-being. In the scenario you described, where work consumes a substantial portion of your day, leaving only minimal time for rest and leisure, it may be time to reevaluate priorities. While dedication to professional pursuits is commendable, it’s crucial to recognize the importance of self-care and personal fulfillment.

    Finding harmony between work and personal life is a continuous journey, and it often involves making deliberate choices to prioritize mental and physical health, as well as leisure activities. By recalibrating your approach, you can strive for a healthier balance that allows for sufficient rest, meaningful engagements, and the exploration of diverse experiences. Embracing a mindset that values both productivity and personal well-being can lead to a more enriching and sustainable lifestyle.

    In working towards this transformation, start by setting realistic boundaries and establishing clear distinctions between work and personal time. This may involve optimizing work processes, delegating tasks when possible, and fostering open communication with colleagues and superiors. Additionally, actively carving out moments for relaxation, recreation, and connecting with loved ones can contribute to a more holistic lifestyle. Remember, achieving a sustainable work-life balance requires deliberate effort, but the rewards in terms of overall well-being and contentment are immeasurable.

    By striving to embrace a more harmonious approach to life, rooted in the appreciation of diverse experiences and personal fulfillment, you pave the way for a more gratifying and sustainable existence. With this mindset, you can foster a life where work is a part of the journey, rather than the sole focus, and create space to cherish the opportunities and joys that life presents.

    The value of work as a productive member of society cannot be overstated. By contributing our skills and efforts, we not only create opportunities for ourselves but also play a role in the greater collective progress. It’s truly commendable to engage in activities that aim to enhance the lives of others, whether through creating something that offers assistance or by simply offering our assistance directly. This spirit of contribution and cooperation is what propels the advancement of the human race, fostering innovation, empathy, and a sense of solidarity among us all.

    If you wait till you retire to spend time with those who really matter, do things that really have an impact on people’s lives, and enjoy the fruit of your labor, then, it will be a very sad ending for you.

    Don’t let that happen. Live now, not later.

  • Telling “why” instead of “what”

    Telling “why” instead of “what”

    Most of the time, when we ask someone to do something, we just give out specific instructions without explaining the why. This leads to undesired results.

    One typical day at work is when your boss contacts you and asks you to do something. Your boss gives you specific instructions on what to do and maybe, asks you when you could give it, or most of the time, your boss would just expect it to be done before lunch or at the end of the day.

    When this happens, we automatically do what we were told to do. Why not? It is the boss who told us to do it and our job is on the line. So, on that typical day, one regular day, we just do what we were told to do, get it done, and go on with our day.

    But it could be better. The day could change. Instead of being a soldier doing what was asked, we could become an artist creating something. The typical day could change to something fulfilling because we will own it.

    How? Instead of listening to step-by-step instructions that are being given to us, ask “why”.

    Why do you need to do it? What are you trying to achieve? Why go through all the steps? What are you aiming for? Why is the work needed? What is the end goal?

    When it comes to following instructions, a common approach is to diligently carry out each step without questioning the rationale behind them. However, an alternative perspective encourages individuals to inquire about the underlying reasons for each action. By understanding the “why” behind a set of instructions, individuals gain valuable insight into the purpose and potential outcomes of their actions. This can lead to a deeper comprehension of the task at hand and foster a more critical and analytical mindset. Through questioning the “why,” individuals may uncover new perspectives, identify potential improvements, and develop a more comprehensive understanding of the processes they are engaging in. Embracing this approach can lead to a more informed and empowered way of interacting with instructions, ultimately promoting a culture of critical thinking and continuous improvement.

    For example, a very simple example, let’s say your boss asks you to pull some data this year and compare it to last year’s data during the same period, place it on a table, and send it to your boss. Very simple. But, do you know what happens after you send it? Your boss will come back to you asking for clarifications or more data or rearranging the table or whatever.

    Why did that happen? Because there is no clear context on what is the purpose of the work. And most of the time, bosses are struggling with multiple items and to be quick, they ask for whatever first thing that comes into their minds. In the end, the work gets repeated because it does not completely help achieve what is being tried to accomplish.

    The process of fulfilling requests in the workplace can often lead to misunderstandings and inefficiencies. Consider the scenario above where a supervisor requests a simple task like pulling and comparing data. Once the task is completed and the data is presented, the supervisor may come back seeking further clarifications, additional data, or adjustments to the presentation. This tendency for follow-up requests can be attributed to the lack of a clear context regarding the purpose of the work. In many cases, supervisors are juggling multiple priorities and, in their efforts to expedite the process, they may simply request the first thing that comes to mind. Consequently, the initial work may not fully contribute to achieving the intended objectives, leading to the need for repeated efforts and a potential waste of time and resources.

    The importance of creating a clear and comprehensive context for any given task cannot be overstated. When employees or team members have a thorough understanding of the purpose behind their assignments, they can align their efforts more effectively and produce work that better serves the organization’s overarching goals. By outlining the specific objectives, expectations, and potential outcomes, supervisors can help ensure that the work generated contributes meaningfully to the desired outcomes. Additionally, fostering an environment where questions are encouraged and open communication is valued can further mitigate the need for repeated tasks and unnecessary revisions, ultimately improving productivity and efficiency within the workplace.

    Communication in the workplace is vital for creating a cohesive and effective team. When subordinates are encouraged to understand the purpose behind their tasks and assignments, they are more likely to feel invested and motivated. This understanding can lead to a greater sense of ownership and accountability for their work, ultimately contributing to a higher quality of output.

    On the other hand, for bosses and managers, taking the time to collaborate with their team members and provide context behind the instructions can lead to greater clarity and understanding. Rather than simply dictating tasks, this approach encourages open dialogue and can lead to a more engaged and satisfied team. When employees feel that their contributions are valued and that they understand the bigger picture, they are more likely to feel fulfilled in their roles.

    By embracing and promoting this effective two-way communication and collaborative approach, organizations can cultivate an environment where open dialogue and shared contributions thrive. This mutual and participatory strategy can lead to not only the attainment of the desired quality of work but also the creation of a more uplifting, constructive, and fruitful work atmosphere. This inclusive methodology promotes a sense of shared responsibility and empowers individuals to contribute to the collective goals, thereby fostering a culture of engagement and productivity.

    It is a two-way street. For the subordinates, ask the question why. What is the purpose of the work? For bosses, instead of giving instructions, collaborate and provide context on what is being accomplished. Having these conversations would help engage people better as there would be ownership, accountability, and a sense of fulfillment. And, ultimately, the quality of work would be near the desired one.

  • The culture of “when” instead of “now”

    The culture of “when” instead of “now”

    The culture of “when” can help us have a stress-free workplace instead of dealing with everything “now”.

    If you feel that when you ask for something and expect it to be done right there and then, you are not respecting other people’s time.

    The internet has made a lot of impossibilities possible. Being able to look for information and communicate immediately with people who are far from us are one of the many perks the invention of the internet has given us.

    The internet has undeniably revolutionized the way we access information and connect with others. Its impact on our daily lives is profound, enabling us to accomplish tasks that were once considered impossible. From conducting research on diverse topics to instantaneously communicating with individuals across the globe, the internet has ushered in an era of unprecedented accessibility and connectivity. Whether it’s seeking knowledge, sharing ideas, or fostering relationships, the internet has become an indispensable tool that continues to redefine boundaries and transcend limitations.

    This gave us instantaneous access to almost everything. Knowledge at the palm of our hands. Entertainment whenever we like it without waiting. Getting connected to people we have not met who give us a like on our posts. Communicating with almost everyone all around the world.

    While these are all good, it gave us an expectation that we get instant results from everything we ask for. This expectation is starting to have a negative effect that we are not seeing now but I think will eventually take a toll on us.

    Take for example at work. When you chat with someone, we expect that the person you are trying to reach will respond immediately. That the person is just in front of his or her laptop or holding his or her phone and when we send a message, we expect that person to respond, immediately.

    The expectations surrounding communication at the workplace have evolved significantly with the widespread adoption of digital technology. Consider a typical scenario in a professional setting: when engaging in a conversation with a colleague, there is often an implicit anticipation of an immediate response. This anticipation is fueled by the presumption that the individual is readily available, either stationed in front of a computer or actively engaged with their mobile device. As a result, there is an inherent assumption that any message relayed will elicit an instantaneous reaction.

    This phenomenon can be attributed to the prevalence of real-time communication tools in modern workplaces. The seamless integration of instant messaging platforms, coupled with the ubiquity of smartphones and laptops, has fostered an environment where immediate responsiveness is the norm. However, while this expediency can enhance operational efficiency, it also presents challenges. The constant expectation of instant communication can lead to feelings of pressure and an incessant need to be continuously available, blurring the boundaries between professional and personal time.

    Moreover, the implicit demand for immediate responses can inadvertently overshadow the necessity for thoughtful contemplation and considered replies. It is essential to recognize the value of allowing individuals the space and time to craft well-considered and comprehensive responses, especially when addressing complex or pivotal matters. Striking a balance between promptness and quality in communication is crucial for fostering a healthy and productive work environment.

    Thus, while the expectation of immediate responses in workplace communication is deeply ingrained, it is imperative to cultivate an organizational culture that values both timeliness and thoughtfulness in exchanges, thereby promoting effective and meaningful interactions among colleagues.

    We have a perception that everyone we talk to over the internet is almost always online and they must respond. Even a five-minute delay in their responses slightly pisses us off. Don’t you feel irritated when the person had seen your message and will not respond? Kind of rude, right?

    It is like we think we are outside that. That everyone else, except ourselves, is supposed to be answering every inquiry immediately. If they do not, then we feel irritated as we wait. And we want our concerns taken care of immediately as we all consider our needs are more important than others.

    But when we step back, we are not always online. We do other stuff too. We do our own things. We take care of things we need to be done at the moment may it be because we must or feel like doing it. That we are not in front of our laptops or on our phones all the time.

    So why do we expect it to be different from others?

    The culture of “now” is so prevalent that we do tend to disrespect other people’s time. We wanted everything instantaneous. We want everything now. We want us to be prioritized now. We want to be considered more important than anyone or anything else. We only have the time “now”. There is no more time for us.

    Why don’t we move to the culture of “when”?

    “When” things must be done and completed that help us achieve out goals? “When” do we respond to people from different parts of our lives? “When” do we spend time to help ourselves grow and be able to help others?

    “When” do we expect people to help us get what we need?

    By shifting our perspective into understanding that others are just exactly like us, it would better help us set clear expectations for ourselves and others. We do not need everything now. We need it by a certain time. It is not a question of how much more important our needs are compared to others. It is a question of when we could expect others to help us achieve what we need to accomplish.

    Of course, life and death situations are different. Let’s not get carried away.

    Let us all respect other people’s time. No one is really more important than anyone else. It is only our perspective in life that tells us what is important and what do we need to prioritize.

    Do you think you are more important than others because of your position in your company or because you have more money? If your answer to this is yes, then please, take a step back and assess.

    Who do we even think we are?

  • Other people’s time

    Other people’s time

    Other people’s time is something we do not think about. We only think about our own time.

    Have you had those times in your life when people keep calling you to ask you to do something that made you feel your time is not being respected?

    I am not talking about people vying for your attention. I am not talking about people depending on you because they know you can do the work. I am not talking about the feeling that you are valued and that is why people keep reaching out to you for help.

    This is not about that.

    What I want to talk about is when people know you are doing something, may it be completing your work or talking to someone or having a break, people still will contact you and say that what they need is urgent. That you need to drop whatever you are doing and attend to their needs.

    And this is not about an urgent ask that happens one time. Sure that is manageable. Sure that can be attended to. Sure you can drop whatever you are doing now and attend to your concern.

    This is not it.

    This is about being contacted to do whatever they ask you to do because they consider their asks is more important than whatever you are doing at the moment. That your work is less important and their needs trample whatever you may have going.

    The issue of being contacted to do whatever they ask you to do because they consider their asks is more important than whatever you are doing at the moment is quite common in various professional and personal settings. It can be frustrating and challenging when others impose their needs and priorities over your own. It’s important to establish boundaries and communicate effectively in such situations. Your work and time are valuable, and it’s essential to assert your priorities and commitments. Finding a balance between accommodating others’ requests and maintaining focus on your tasks is crucial. If this pattern persists, consider discussing the impact with the individuals involved to reach a mutual understanding and establish respectful communication.

    We all live in a fast-paced world. The constant changes. The movements. The needs. All are moving fast and people forget how it impacts the lives of other people. That we get so hung up in our own little world that we assume that others are not doing anything so, if we ask for something, we except it to be given to us immediately.

    The world we live in today is undeniably fast-paced. With constant changes, rapid movements, and ever-increasing demands, it’s easy to get caught up in our own little worlds. We often overlook how our actions and expectations can impact the lives of others. This can lead to a mindset where we assume that others are not as occupied as we are, thus expecting immediate responses to our requests. It’s important to take a step back and consider the broader picture, acknowledging that everyone is navigating their own set of responsibilities and challenges. By fostering a greater understanding of each other’s realities, we can cultivate a more patient and empathetic approach to interactions in this dynamic world.

    Why do we even do this?

    Because we are all selfish at some point. By trying to be conscious of how we please other people, especially our bosses, we tend to forget to understand that other people have their own things to do. We even fail to ask if the person can manage to deliver it at that moment or at a specified time. We fail to ask if they are engaged with something and just demand that our needs be met right there and then.

    It’s important to recognize that the behavior of being overly focused on our own needs and expectations, without considering the circumstances or needs of others, can have negative consequences on our relationships and the overall dynamics within a team or organization. When we prioritize our own desires without regard for the capacity or availability of others, it can lead to strained interactions and unmet expectations. Therefore, fostering a more considerate and empathetic approach towards our colleagues and acquaintances is pivotal in nurturing healthy and productive relationships. By pausing to consider the perspectives and commitments of others, we can create a more harmonious environment where everyone feels valued and respected.

    And when it is your turn to ask, you get a seen zone. How’s that for caring?

    For all of us, take a pause. Look around you. Understand what others are going through. Talk to them. Talk on a personal level and not just because you need to ask something. Build real relationships. Focus on doing something that could last a lifetime so that you can say that you have done what is right for you and other people when you take in that last breath of yours.

    In the hustle and bustle of our daily lives, it’s easy to get caught up in our own concerns and overlook the struggles and experiences of those around us. Taking a moment to truly observe and comprehend the situations of others can be transformative. Engaging in genuine, heartfelt conversations, not driven by agendas or self-interest, can foster deep and meaningful connections. These connections can transcend fleeting moments and have a lasting, positive impact, enriching not only our lives but also the lives of those we interact with. Focusing on actions that contribute to the well-being of others can create a sense of fulfillment and purpose that extends far beyond our immediate circumstances. It’s truly a profound reflection on the significance of our actions and relationships, reminding us to invest in experiences and connections that endure and hold meaning, even as we contemplate the culmination of our lives.

    When faced with adversity, our true nature and strength emerge. How we respond to challenging circumstances speaks volumes about our integrity and resilience. In times of hardship, our actions carry more weight than mere words. It is easy to make promises and speak of good intentions, but when the going gets tough, our responses define who we are at our core. It is in these moments that our character and maturity shine through, shaping the way we are perceived by others and, more importantly, how we perceive ourselves. Therefore, let us remember that what truly matters is not what is said before, but the choices and actions we make when faced with difficulty.

    A final note. Action speaks louder than words. True. In addition, the action you take during a bad situation defines your character and maturity. Whatever was said before that, it doesn’t matter anymore.

  • | deserving

    | deserving

    Do we really think we deserve more than what we receive in exchange for our efforts? Are we overvaluing our work even if it is what is expected?

    “I just want to understand what I did to get this raise so I could correct it,” Janice said. She was having a virtual meeting with Jim trying to get a sense of the small raise and bonus she received in December.

    “Why are you asking?” Jim probed. He was at home that day same with Janice. They had been working from home since the pandemic started.

    “I want to know because I know I did everything I was told to do and I should be getting more than this.” Janice replied.

    “What other things have you done to make you think you should be getting more?” Jim asked.

    “I did what I was told. I do not make mistakes. Why would others get more than I did?” Janice said. While she tried to control the tone of her voice, there is a slight irritation in her from Jim’s repeated questioning. She is not getting the answer she wanted.

    “Did you ask how much others get?” Jim asked. Although he knew it would happen and believes nothing is wrong with that, which is still, up to this point, asking for someone’s compensation is not a welcomed idea, he still probed so he could better give an appropriate response. He did not want Janice to escalate to HR if it comes to that.

    “Well, at first, I was happy with my increase. But then, I thought of asking and learned that in comparison, I was the one who received the lowest increase. Those who made a lot of mistakes and did not complete their tasks got more. Way more than what I got.” Janice responded.

    To this, Jim slightly got irritated. She had been comparing her performance with others and had always been spotting their errors. While that was good to make the team better, she did not do anything to help them correct their ways. Her actions were meant to call out the errors and it ends there. They talked about this before but nothing changed.

    Jim took a long breath and slowly exhaled before responding.

    “Janice, I am going to tell you the truth about business. And from this point on, I will impart something to you so please listen.” Jim waited for Janice to respond yes before continuing.

    “First, we all should be grateful for what we received. No matter how much it is. Others did not get anything and they are okay with it. They look at the good side of it that they still have their jobs.”

    “It is not that…” Janice started.

    “Listen.” Jim cut her off. “Just listen for now.”

    Jim stayed silent for a few seconds. They had their cameras off so they can not see each other’s facial expressions. A wall built by working remotely.

    He continued,”Be grateful. That’s one.”

    “Second, do not compare yourself to others, ever. They have their own lives. You have your own. I bet that if you get a higher increase than them, you will still ask around.”

    “No. It is not…”Janice started again but Jim interrupted her.

    “Janice. Listen. This is the third time I said it. I am trying to impart to you something but you are not listening.”

    Janice shut up. She just stayed silent. Jim had no way of knowing if she was really intended on listening this time but he pushed on.

    “The company has a total budget allocated for any annual increase in compensation and bonuses. It is then distributed according to the performance and value each of us brings to the company. Now, when you said you are doing what you are told, that is the bare minimum. That is expected from you. If you did not do that, you would not get anything.”

    Janice kept silent this time.

    “You have to start looking forward. What do you need to do to get more? Is that even your priority? How will that affect your desire to start a family? Is it all about money or is it about helping others achieve their own goals?

    “Because, Janice, if you are trying to aim to get more money just for the sake of it so you can buy what you want to buy, then you are aiming for the wrong things. Money helps us achieve what we want to achieve. It is a tool. It is not the goal.

    “Do not go after it. Focus on what you want to do. And the money will eventually come. Not today. Not tomorrow. But eventually, it will.”

    Jin stopped and waited for Janice to respond.

    “Thank you, Jim. I still am not clear but I’ll try to remember what you said. Maybe I will understand it someday.”

    “Alright. I have to drop off now for another call. Ping me if you want to talk some more.”

    “Will do. Thanks again.” Then, they both disconnected.

    A few days had passed. Weeks, months, and years. Jim had never gotten a chance to talk to Janice again. Janice moved to a different account. Jim moved to a different company. They lost touch. What happened after that conversation, no one knows.

    But Jim remembers that conversation well. He thought if he gave the right advice. Was telling her to be grateful and just wait the right move? Or was it something he just said to shut her up and stop complaining about what she got? Isn’t it about getting what she deserves for the work she has done? Wasn’t that the essence of working?

    Maybe he thought of giving that advice because he himself never asked for anything. He just focused on the work that was required. He was thankful for all that was given to him – the recognition, the bonuses, the awards, the promotion. He was told that he deserved it. But then again, aiming for it was never his playbook.

    Whatever comes his way is a byproduct of the work he has done.

    Deserving is just another word for entitlement.

  • | staying

    | staying

    Have you asked yourself if you can do everyday what you are doing now for the next five or ten years?

    Can I pull you into this call? I need details. That was the message on this screen. He read it but did not respond.

    “What we could do is get the data ready, prepare our analysis, then talk to Bryan before we send it to the client,” Mark said over the phone. Jim and he are discussing what to do next after the client call they just had.

    Jim did not respond for a few seconds. He was trying to calm his self as he got irritated with the message.

    “We could probably talk about the impact of the system issues we had as that really killed us.” Mark continued.

    I can’t keep doing this. Jim thought. This is just work. I don’t want to keep doing this.

    Jim has been in his line of work for almost 20 years and since he started, it has been a never-ending battle of explaining what happened and if the client is not satisfied, everything goes haywire. He enjoyed it at the start when the data tells the story but now in his 40s, he felt tired from the constant barrage of people asking questions left and right.

    “Did we report that we have a system outage that day because if not it will blow back to our faces for not following the process?” Jim asked Mark while closing the message he received and ignoring the rest of the unread messages.

    “I can check that with Steve. But that is our best bet. Unless you want to tell that people were not doing their jobs, then I think this is the best we could do.” Mark said.

    Two days after Christmas, the calls poured in. Everyone was at work but they still failed to answer all calls that got the attention of the client for not servicing their customers. The industry Jim was in a customer contact center in which they provide people for their clients to support their client’s customers. He had been in this industry for far too long.

    And he is getting tired of it.

    “There must be something else. Keep those in your back pocket and support them with data. Look deeper on what happened. Check when the calls arrive and how much we are receiving almost simultaneously. We can not support all of the customers if all of them call at the same second.” Jim said.

    You there? The message that popped up on Jim’s screen.

    I am with Rasheed and Arvind now. We need to discuss financials. Can you join? The rest of the message said. Jim read and continued to ignore it.

    “Oh right. I’ll look into that. How about the length of each call? That would have all of our agents occupied and would not be able to take the calls.”, Mark asked.

    “Yes. We can get that too. Compare to what we had planned for and what was the actual to see the variance then what caused that.”, Jim replied as he closed the message.

    It was about 5 minutes to the end of his shift. Well, to the end of his 12-hour shift that day. He had to start early as he was called to get an analysis out that was needed before the start of the day. Now, reading the messages, he was still needed after almost half of the day.

    “Alright. Anything else?” Mark asked.

    “Anything you see that we need Operations to know, get it and let’s show it at Monday’s Management Meeting. Let’s discuss there our next course of action.” Jim said. It is Friday. Jim just wanted the week over.

    “Alright. I’ll get to it.” Mark replied. They both said goodbye and agreed to talk early Monday for the analysis.

    Jim’s phone lit up. A message notification popped up. He always has it on silent for messages and only calls were set up for sound alerts. He picked up his phone from the table and opened the message. His notifications only show the app and the sender. He turned off the message previews too. That way, no one will accidentally read the message.

    You have been doing this for almost 20 years. Can you still do it in the next five years? Can you still deal with the long hours and daily stress? The message said. It was from a colleague he respects from whom he would always ask and get some advice.

    Jim typed his response. Could it be I am just tired now and feeling irritated because of incessant inquiries from different people? He sent it.

    A couple of seconds later, his friend responded. Bro, you’ve been saying this for the past two years. You even quit from your previous company just a year ago because of long hours. You’ve been feeling this way for long.

    He is right. Jim thought. He had been in a higher position before and he did not like the toll it gave him. The high demand, the high stress, the long hours. He did not like it. To him, it is like living to work instead of working to live.

    You’re right. Thanks. Really helpful to talk to you. Jim responded.

    Just think and assess. It is not about wondering if you are fit. It is reassessing your life. What do you really want to do that you do not feel forced to do? His friend responded.

    Jim thanked again his friend. He closed his laptop and stood up to get out of the house to have a smoke.

    He lit up a stick in the garage. Blew out smoke and now devising a plan in his head.

    His mind wandered and thought about his journey from the time he was a customer service representative to now being one of those who run the business. It was simple back then compared to now. Of course the money was way lower than what he has now in his position which is his primary driving force.

    But, now that he is almost at the top, he keeps on contemplating if he can continue doing this.

    How would I tell her that I am moving on to do other things?

  • | expectations

    | expectations

    What if your actual work is not what you expected when you were hired?

    Jim is wearing his usual white polo shirt tucked with his blue jeans pants. This is what he always wears in the office. He was following what Steve Jobs and Mark Zuckerberg do for their clothes. The minimal decisions on small things to make every day, the more he has time to think about important things.

    The supervisor who reports to him is about six months into the team. He is not new. He had worked with him before in their previous company and he knows he could trust him to do the job. He has proven over and over again that he can deliver so to him, there is no doubt in his mind that he would take care of their deliverables while he was gone.

    Jim took a week-long vacation to celebrate his birthday with his family. During this time, he had disconnected from any means of communication at work. He keeps a strict rule on this. Whenever he is on vacation, during the weekend, or already out of his shift, he totally disconnects. He doesn’t have a work email or messaging app on his phone and he keeps his phone for personal use. Anyway, if something is really urgent, they can call him.

    The week he got back from vacation, Jim talked to his boss to get updates. Nothing unusual, she said. I was able to get what I need from the team, she said. Just a few follow-throughs we need to complete this week, she said.

    Good, I thought. Then there is no need to backtrack and we continue moving forward.

    Jim and his boss start about 3 hours before the rest of their team starts. The business provides customer service 24 hours a day so the schedule of the entire team is spread out throughout the day.

    A little past 8 in the morning when Jim sent a message to his supervisor:

    Hey. Good morning. Ping me when you are here and let’s talk. Just give me updates.

    His supervisor replied, I am here. We can talk in about 30 minutes. That works?

    Alright. Just come here in the room, Jim replied.

    Ok. His supervisor replied. Jim stood up to get coffee from the pantry which by this time would be empty as people are starting to log on to their desks.

    When Jim got back he was surprised to see his supervisor by the door waiting for him.

    “Mark, how are you? You seem 15 minutes early.”, Jim said while approaching Mark and motioning him to get inside the room.

    “I have nothing yet to do so I decided to come here since I know you’ve been here and have free time now.”, Mark said while pulling out the chair in front of Mark’s table to sit down.

    Jim went to his seat at the other side of the table and settled his silver coffee mug down on the table while grabbing the chair to sit down.

    “How are things? Any issues while I was out? Anything urgent on our plate this week?” Jim asked as he sat and swiveled a little bit on his chair.

    “No issues. Nothing urgent for this week. Our usual client meetings. I was able to provide Sam with what she asked for last week. I worked from 5 to 5 so I could cover the team as she kept reaching out to me.”, Mark said.

    “Why? That’s long. Where was Steve?”. Steve is one of Jim’s supervisors who is mainly responsible for the later hours as Mark covers the early part of the day.

    “He was in. But Sam always reached out to me which surprised me as her questions were Steve’s scope.”

    “Ok. And what happened?”

    “I was able to give to her just like what I said.”

    Jim sensed something else was bothering Mark.

    “Ok. Which to me is good except the long hours. What is bothering you?” Jim asked.

    Mark took a deep breath before saying, “This is not what I had signed up for.”

    Jim didn’t want to jump to conclusions so he asked Mark what did he mean by it.

    “You know with everything that had happened with my transfer, to my role, to my salary, and last week, it was like more was being expected from me. I feel like my compensation is not enough for the work I am doing.”, Mark responded calmly.

    Mark was having issues with his compensation, role, and level. He joined the company under a different department and has been there for eight months before he moved to Jim’s department with the expectation that he would get promoted and of course, better compensation. Six months into their department, that has not happened yet because of processes that were missed and he is suffering because of it.

    “What happened? Why are you feeling this way now?” Jim asked. They discussed his situation before and he is scheduled to be promoted in three months. Jim now is wondering what caused him to get all these concerns back.

    “When you were out, it felt like everything is my responsibility even if it is not my scope. That I did not expect. It is like I was supposed to deliver things when in fact, you got Steve to do that. That made me think again about my role and compensation which until now, I have not gotten. I feel it is just unfair.” Mark explained.

    “What else?”, Jim asked to see if there is anything else.

    “I am tempted to entertain the offers I am getting outside. Same work I am doing. Higher compensation than what I have. But I do not want to leave. I like it here. I like working with you. It is just that last week, it hit me with all the things Sam kept asking of me. This is not what I signed up for. Why am I even here?”

    “Okay.”, Jim started. “There are two ways how to see what is happening to you. One, it is unfair for you to do the work without being compensated enough. That we are working out already and because of how large our company is, there are processes that we must strictly adhere to. You know in that aspect, I do not have enough influence.”

    Mark nodded as this he understood clearly and they both talked about it were before.

    “Second”, Jim continued, “is to view what happened as what to expect in two or three years. What you experienced last week is a taste of how is it like to have a higher position. It is very noisy. It is very stressful. It is a level that will require most of your time. It is a level that will drain your brain power. It is where you work almost nonstop.”

    “That is my world.”, Jim added while leaning back for a bit on his chair. “It is much noisier on Sam’s level which you know I had been and I do not want that for me as I do not get to do other things I want.”

    “Now, if you look at it from that perspective, ask yourself, is this what I want to do for five or ten years? Because if it is, then whatever your situation now, will get rewarded in the future. And if not, and that is fine, at least you know what could happen in the future if you decide to move further up. Settling where you are now is okay in terms of what you do. But do not expect big rewards.” Jim finished while looking at Mark’s eyes. He picked up his mug and sipped his coffee.

    “Yeah. I think everything just weighed down on me and brought back my issue because of the incessant questions from Sam. Is she really like that? I don’t get that much time with here except last week when you were out.” Mark replied while rocking back and forth on his chair.

    “She moves fast because she had a lot of things to complete and she trust us to get our own department in order so she doesn’t need to think about it which is what we have been doing.” Jim answered with a tinge of pride.

    “I think I just got overwhelmed. But don’t worry Jim, I will still do what you except me to do. That I can promise you. I’ll wait and hope that my status will finally be fixed in the next three months.”, Mark said with a little bit of conviction.

    “Good to hear.” Jim stood up. “I know you keep to your commitments and promises. That is why I want you in the team.” Jim slowly walked towards the door and opened it.

    “Just remember what you experienced and decide if that, along with the possibility of more money and more stress, is something you can do for five years.” Jim said while Mark was standing up and walked towards the door.

    “I can’t say now but yes. That is something for me to think of. Thanks Jim.”